Heartbreaking to see Harry’s litany of gripes that corroded his bonds with Wills and Kate
careful as the Duchess of Cambridge operated. If she did, she had no respect for the kind of complicit acceptance that is so much part of Kate’s character. Add to that the fact that the Sussexes felt bitterly that everything they tried to do was superseded by William and Kate’s higher status as Royals – as the book claims – and it was a perfect storm.
‘They had to take a back seat,’ the authors write. ‘ Sometimes they would be told their projects had to wait when the Prince of Wales or Prince William had an initiative or tour being announced at the same time.’ The book points out that the relationship between Kate and Meghan struggled to get past the cool politeness of their first meeting. They were cordial on the surface yet the two women barely seemed to speak.Harry and Meghan felt that their wishes were being disregarded, that they were being patronised by courtiers and family and that, say the authors, they had been driven to plotting their escape from the Royal Family in secret. There was genuine hurt on both sides.
But the real roots of the dispute between the Sussexes and Cambridges lie much deeper in the shared past of the two brothers.
In particular, there is the difference in character between the two princes. Harry appears to think he has done his share of conforming and weight-pulling and his voice for change deserves to be heard. William, on the other hand, being ‘the important one’, as Harry frequently describes him, has accepted the restraints of his position.
It began when they were still young boys. William always showed a notable reluctance to put himself on public show. He disliked being recognised and was embarrassed by royalty’s display of pomp. Harry, on the other hand, loved it and told William if he didn’t want to be King, he’d take on the role.
For the fundamental fact is that Harry is just not happy being second-in-command, both in terms of hierarchy or finances. He likes being in control and subconsciously resents William’s superior financial position and future power.
‘I’m not the important one,’ Harry often said. A view that was enforced when he saw his great- grandmother, the Queen Mother, who only ever focused her attention on William. But instead of disappearing into anonymity, Harry became the golden ticket. People wanted to hear what he had to say and know what he wanted to do. He appeared in military fatigues in war zones during his fulfilling Army career.
By comparison, William appeared worthy and dull. William married his long-term girlfriend, Kate Middleton, while Harry had a string of blonde and leggy lovers. Suddenly their roles appeared reversed. But they were not.
It was William, not Harry, being prepped for the throne. It was when William reminded Harry of their mother’s advice – not to marry in haste – that an invisible line seemed to have been crossed.
‘You haven’t known her very long. Are you sure you’re doing the right thing?’ he asked Harry.
Furious that his brother should appear to be anything other than 100 per cent supportive of his decision to marry Meghan, Harry convinced himself the family were also against his choice.
When Archie was born, Kate made overtures of friendship but, to the Sussexes, it came too late. Meghan’s friends complained she felt there was no support for her.
But the rift between the couples was confirmed publicly in October, when the couple gave an interview to ITN’s Tom Bradby in which Harry, when asked about his relationship with his brother, said ‘stuff happens’ and that ‘we are certainly on different paths at the moment’.
Before leaving to spend six weeks in Canada at the end of last year, Harry spoke to Charles and the Queen about the need for change. As the book outlines, he felt at once used for their popularity, hounded by the press because of the public’s fascination with them and then disparaged back within the institution’s walls.
It didn’t help, say the authors, that when the Queen gave her speech in the Green Drawing Room at Buckingham Palace on Christmas Day last year, it was with photographs of the Cambridges and their children, Charles and Camilla, Prince Philip and a black-and-white image of her father – the line of succession that so obviously excluded Harry.
Relations worsened further in January when the family negotiated Meghan and Harry’s new roles. William didn’t take their plans well. He also remained upset that private family matters were being made public by the couple on their Sussex Royal website. As a Palace source t old t he book’s authors: ‘It’s not anger. It’s hurt.’
But being who they are has given William and Harry a lot to contend with. Their childhood was a maelstrom of conflicting emotions that included arguments, separation, divorce and death, which turned their lives into an international soap opera. The stability so vital to children’s development was denied them and that produced problems that even in adulthood they are still trying to resolve.
Perhaps Prince Philip should have the last word. He has carefully avoided becoming involved in the Harry and Meghan debacle. But if he ever had a good piece of advice to give his grandson it was when asked if he missed being able to walk unnoticed in a public place.
He replied: ‘It’s like saying, “Don’t you miss going to the Moon?” I mean, I just haven’t had the opportunity of going to the Moon. You can’t go through life desperately wanting to be somebody else, wanting to do something else all the time.’ He is right. And, from this new book, it is clear that it is something William has accepted but Harry has not.