Restaurants
PORTA AND JOSEPH BENJAMIN, CHESTER
SIX PORTLAND ROAD, LONDON W11
In the last issue, Roger Lewis decided that Britain has ‘rubbish’ restaurants, especially at its extremities. Although Roger is one of the funniest writers in Britain, he lives forever in Carry-on-Camping-land, where ketchup and condiments wash down spam fritters, and we all have a vampire-like fear of garlic. Whereas the French and Italian bourgeoisie mock those who eat simple dishes such as spaghetti in tomato sauce every day, we Brits enjoy nothing more than deriding foodies who strive in the opposite direction.
We are absolutely convinced that our European neighbours have infinitely better restaurants. But would I rather spend six months eating out in the restaurants of staid Paris than vibrant London? Never. Not for all the foie gras in Aquitaine. Our restaurants are much livelier, and the variety of international cuisine is only matched by New York. The restaurants of France and Italy, like their music, are for the most part woefully nationalistic and uninventive.
We forget how far we have come since Derek Cooper published The Bad Food Guide in 1967. Eating in public was still a novel experience then, and one which only began for most of the population during the Second World War, due to the launch of the 2,000 cheap British Restaurants and 18,000 work canteens, which were off-ration. It took the French 44 years to win the Five Nations Rugby, in 1954; it has taken Britain much the same time to raise its gastro game since Michelin deemed it worth publishing a guide to Fanny Cradock’s sceptred isle in
1974. Then, we had 21 Michelin-starred restaurants; we now have 175, still far behind France’s 621, but Michelin doesn’t rate imagination and atmosphere.
Where Britain falls behind is in serving good food cheaply. Little wonder, given food prices have risen 25 per cent since the pound tumbled after the referendum. France has 644 Bib Gourmand restaurants (ones serving three courses for under £28); Britain has just 145. Joseph Benjamin in Chester is one of those. It’s right by the extant North Gate of Chester, next door to its excellent subterranean tapas bar, Porta, where I took my Token Northern Friends and their son, Fergus, who was revising for his A-level mocks. When asked what he’d liked to drink, the little lad demanded a large gin and tonic. He also has a beard, and looks (and may well be) not a day under 28. Joseph Benjamin has a more expansive menu and ceiling, better suited for tall people.
I have recently discovered London’s greatest bargain, Six Portland Road, in Holland Park. That it offers a three-course lunch for £19.50 and has not been granted Bib Gourmand status proves that the Michelin system is arcane and irrational. And anti-british. It is just the sort of deft little place around the corner that we Brits mistakenly believe can only be found in Paris.
Porta and Joseph Benjamin, 140 Northgate Street, Chester CH1 2HT; www.josephbenjamin.co.uk; 01244 344295; three-course dinner £22-£35. Plus, Porta at 50 Greenwood Street, Altrincham WA14 1RZ.
Six Portland Road, London W11 4LA; www.sixportlandroad.com; 020 7229 3130; three-course lunch £19.50.