Kate’s naturism show’s a no-no

BRITS spend two years and nine months of their lives dithering over daily dilemmas, research reveals. Deciding what to have for dinner takes seven minutes a day and what to wear wastes four. And I’m in two minds about the whole study. I like Springwatch star Kate Humble. She’s a great presenter and wildlife champ, a natural beauty who hates getting tarted up and, very refreshingly, admits she’s childless by choice as her “maternal gene is missing”.

But I wish Kate, 48, would stop banging-on about stripping off.

She constantly brags about running around the garden naked to commune with nature – while telling US we’re “weirdly obsessed” with nudity.

And now she wants the BBC to give her a naked nature show called Nude Watch.

In my Humble opinion Kate, that’s cuckoo.

Because while viewers would love to see your great t**s, you’d need a male of the species too.

And I’m not sure anyone’s ready to see Chris Packham unpacking.

Or, God forbid, Bill Oddie in the nuddie. HIPSTERS are queuing up to try a new range of alcoholic drinks – brewed with human spit. It’s an ancient Peruvian practice, apparently. A chemical in saliva breaks down starch into sugar, which reacts with yeast to produce alcohol. And it’s safe because fermentation kills bacteria. Trendy beardy blokes in East London are positively drooling over the idea of beer, sake and mojito cocktails which someone else has gobbed in. Where? Spitalfields of course.