A Gift That Keeps Giving

Living life to the fullest is the order of the day in this uplifting short story by Christine Bryant.

JESS stared down at the round parcel on Mel’s kitchen table. Her eyes were wide with wonder. “What d’you think it is?” Mel looked up at her neighbour and shrugged.

“I really have no idea. Knowing Aunt Eunice, it could be anything.”

“It looks like a hat box.” Jess ran a finger over the outside cover of brown paper.

“But who sends hats these days? Who buys them, for that matter? Only for weddings, or Ascot, or something.”

The kettle boiled, and Mel went to make coffee.

“You don’t know Aunt Eunice. She’s someone who’d wear a hat any day. She’s eighty this week and still globetrotting.”

Great-aunt Eunice had been travelling the world for as long as Mel could remember. She had been everywhere, it seemed.

At that moment, she was in Egypt – probably windsurfing on the Nile, or abseiling down pyramids.

Mel stirred the coffee and passed a cup to Jess. “Open it,” Jess said. “I can’t. It’s a present for my birthday. She said in her last letter that she was sending it.”

“Who’s going to know?” Mel hesitated.

She leaned across and started to pick at the wrapping, but the packaging was secure.

After the first rip, Mel stopped, remembering her aunt had a habit of dropping in from her travels without warning.

“I can’t. She’ll know.

Don’t ask me how, but she’ll know.

“There’ll be a knock at the door, and she’ll be on the doorstep.”

“Well, then, I think we should have a chocolate biscuit while you fight your conscience and then finally give in!” Jess laughed.

Mel passed her the tin. Jess took two and passed it back to her.

“No, thanks,” Mel said. “I mustn’t.”

Jess looked at her.

“Still on the sardines and celery?”

Mel took a swig of coffee, trying for the umpteenth time to rid herself of the taste of sardines.

“Yes.”

She swallowed hard and the taste returned with a vengeance.

“How’s that going?” Jess asked, pulling a face.

Mel sighed.

“I’ve only lost four pounds, but it does say it’ll be slow to start with.”

Jess nodded.

“That’s the trouble. When I did the crispy bacon and broad bean diet, they said weight loss would be slow.

“I did eventually lose five pounds, but by that time I was so fed up I put it all back on again.”

“If only there was an easier way.” Mel sighed.

For as long as she could remember, Mel had had problems with her weight.

She was, she thought, a typical yo-yo dieter. There didn’t seem to be a diet on the planet she hadn’t tried,

It was taking all of Mel’s willpower not to open the mysterious package from Aunt Eunice . . .

but all to no avail.

The weight refused to move. If it did, it just hid sneakily around the corner and reattached itself to her at the earliest opportunity.

Mel was checking fat and sugar content long before it became fashionable.

Every trip to the supermarket felt like an undercover mission for the Secret Service, as she checked all the labels.

She weighed herself each morning and again at night.

“Four pounds!” Jess said. “Do you feel any different?” “Oh, yes.”

It was true, she did. She felt queasy.

Jess helped herself to another biscuit.

“I admire your willpower. I’m not sure I could do it.”

“It’ll be worth it if it works.” Mel squeezed her spare tyre. “I want to get into those jeans.”

“You look just fine to me,” a voice said.

Mel’s husband, Graham, had walked in. His curly hair was standing on end, proof of the strong wind

blowing outside.

“Coffee?” Mel asked. “Lovely.” He walked across to the sink and began to wash his hands.

Then his gaze fell on the parcel, still sitting on the table, looking mysterious. “Hello, what’s this?”

“It just arrived. It’s my birthday present from Eunice. She said she’d post it before she went.”

“Ah, yes, she’s off on her travels again, isn’t she?” He looked across at Jess. “You haven’t met Eunice, have you?”

Jess shook her head. Graham grinned.

“She’s a character. Half the time, she thinks she’s Agatha Christie, trying to solve things.

“I keep telling her

Interpol can manage without her help.”

“I’d like to meet her,”

Jess said.

“You’d like her,” Mel told her. “She’s got spirit.”

Jess rose from the table. “Well, if she drops in, give me a ring. And when you finally open that . . .” she pointed to the mystery gift “. . . let me know.”

“You know it’s probably a tin of biscuits,” Graham whispered as they watched Jess disappear up the path.

“Eunice wouldn’t be that cruel,” Mel replied. “She knows I watch my weight!”

“You don’t need to,” Graham reproved.

****

Mel managed to last another two whole days on the sardines and celery and then, fortunately, Graham discovered a brand-new diet.

Mel couldn’t help wondering if the smell of sardines was getting on his nerves, too.

“It’s fantastic,” Jess said, as they sat in the café that afternoon. “You can eat chocolate. And ice-cream! Even cream cakes . . .”

“I know,” Mel said enthusiastically. “Graham got it off the internet. Apparently, all the women at his work are doing it.”

Jess read the title aloud. “The Singles Diet.”

A smile erupted across her face.

“Sounds perfect for us!” she cried. “Look, just about everything’s on it!

“Mind you, we’re married – do you think that matters?”

Mel shook her head. “I shouldn’t think so. It was probably invented by a couple of single people, that’s all.

“Probably means it’s ideal for people with busy lives. Which it is, if you look at it.

“I mean, no big meals, food on the go. It’s perfect. People like us don’t have a lot of time, do we?”

“No,” Jess agreed. “Right, what’s this second part, then?”

Mel pulled another sheet of paper from her bag.

“Well,” she said, “as I understand it, you do the things on this second bit in conjunction with the diet.

“Apparently it gives maximum absorption of the nutrients and aids weight loss.”

“Really? Ooh, let’s have a look.”

They studied the sheets. “What is it then . . . exercises?”

“Well, sort of,” Mel said. “It gives you a set amount of exercise, morning and night.”

“Oh, yes, I see,” Jess said. “Cycling, walking . . . oh, you need a dog.”

“We could borrow Mrs Watson’s,” Mel said cheerfully. “We could walk them for her.”

“Good idea! Now, what else?”

“Well, there’s mental exercises as well. You can choose any puzzle you like, but – and here’s the weird bit – you have to do the puzzle while you’re eating.” “While you’re eating?” Mel nodded.

“So it’s fork in one hand and pen in the other?” “Suppose so,” Mel said. Jess studied the page. “Precise measurements? Well, that should be easy; we’ve been measuring food for years.”

Mel took the page from her.

“No, that’s what I said, but Graham says it doesn’t mean that. It means you have to cut all your food into precise pieces.

“They must all be no bigger than half an inch.”

“Right,” Jess murmured, “I think I can manage that.”

“It must be precise,” Mel told her. “You have to measure it with a ruler or it doesn’t work.”

“Wow! Isn’t it clever? I wonder how they worked that out? I’m going to start this afternoon.”

“Me, too,” Mel said. “Oh, there is one more thing.

“You can have as many cream cakes as you like, but first you must eat a whole apple, and drink a glass of water from a blue glass.”

“Why blue?”

Mel shrugged.

“I don’t know, but I’ve got to get one, because we don’t have any blue ones.”

“Me, neither. At last!” Jess squealed. “A diet that’s fun!”

“And,” Mel told her, “there are more parts to it. You do each one for a month.

“Graham says if I get on with it OK, he’ll download the second part for me.”

“Brilliant!” Jess cried. “I’ll do it with you. Now . . . a blue glass . . .”

They eventually found some blue glasses in the last shop they tried.

“I meant to ask,” Jess said as they watched the assistant wrap their glasses in tissue paper. “Did you open the present yet?”

Mel looked at her, sheepishly.

“I did undo the brown layer,” she said. “And would you believe there’s another box inside it wrapped in silver paper?”

“So we still don’t know. When are you going to open the rest?”

“I’m not,” Mel answered. “Not till my birthday.”

“Bet you do!” Jess teased.

“Bet I don’t,” Mel retorted. “Come on, let’s get home and try out these glasses!”

****

I should have guessed, Mel thought to herself, as she stood before the mirror the following day.

I should have known from the very start.

She and Jess had been on the new diet for a whole day. A whole day of measuring, walking dogs, cycling and filling in puzzles. Not to mention drinking lots of water from a blue glass.

Then, this morning, Graham told her the truth. He’d dreamed up the whole thing himself.

“I’m sorry, pet,” he said. “I never dreamed you’d rush off and show it to

Jess, let alone buy glasses.

“It’s just . . . well, I was just trying to show you you’re perfect as you are.”

“Can you believe,” Mel said later, “we were daft enough to go out and buy blue glasses? What a waste!”

“Are you going to forgive him?” Jess asked.

“I haven’t decided yet,” Mel said. “I might do, because I think he meant well.

“And he’s being very affectionate and considerate.”

Jess giggled.

“Maybe you should wait a while, then. What will you

There didn’t seem to be a diet on the planet Mel hadn’t tried

do now? Go back on the sardines and celery?”

Mel pulled a face.

“No, I can’t face it any more. Guess it’ll just have to be my trusty tape measure.

“Do you know the really annoying thing, though? I was so cross when he told me, I ripped another layer of paper off Eunice’s present.”

“You know what it is, then?”

Mel frowned.

“No.” She sighed. “There’s a multi-coloured layer underneath.”

****

Maybe it wasn’t such a terrible waste, Mel thought as she looked at the night light, sparkling prettily in her new blue glass.

She had had fun

decorating the glass and it did look lovely on the little table.

It was keeping Eunice’s present company until her birthday.

The present now had an outer covering of brightly coloured balloons, because she had accidentally ripped a bit as she was cleaning. There couldn’t be many more wrappings, surely.

She was definitely leaving it now until her birthday. Eunice could drop in any time.

She’d decided to forgive Graham after flowers, dinner and tickets to a

West End show.

Everything was back to normal, although she had listened to what he had advised.

She consigned her tape measure to the dustbin, and promised never to check a calorific value again.

On the plus side, Mel found she had lost some weight.

Whether it was Graham’s diet or the sardines and celery, she wasn’t sure.

To celebrate, she’d taken another layer of paper off Eunice’s gift, so now it sat resplendent in pink and purple, with showers of lilac stars.

****

It was lunchtime on Mel’s birthday.

She and Jess were ardent believers in making a big deal of birthdays and Christmas, so every year, on those and any other special days, they ate exactly what they wanted and worried later.

Jess watched as the huge hand on the clock in the King’s Arms ticked over to midday.

“This is nice,” she said with a sigh. “Happy birthday, Mel.”

“Thank you,” Mel said. “I’ve got a whole day, and I’m going to make the most of it.”

Graham appeared, with arms loaded with crisps and a tray of drinks.

“Happy birthday, sweetheart,” he said. “Smokey bacon?”

“Yes, please!”

Jess looked up as her husband, Tony, sat beside her.

“Roast chicken for me!” Jess said. “Oh, Mel, I meant to tell you. Mrs Watson has asked if we’ll continue taking the dogs out for her.

“Her arthritis is too bad these days.”

“Of course we will!” Mel said. “I enjoy our walks.”

“Me, too,” Jess said.

“And it looks like word’s got out. Shirley Abrahams stopped me in the village this morning.

“She’s got a new full-time job in London and she asked whether we could walk Oscar and Sukie for her?

“I said we’d be happy to, but she’s insisting on giving us something.”

“Sounds like you two are going into business,” Tony said.

Graham slid four drinks off the tray.

“Why don’t you?” he suggested. “You could start with dog-walking and branch out into other things.”

“What sort of other things?”

“Well, I don’t know . . . pet-sitting, taking pets to vet appointments, holiday cover, that sort of thing.”

The opening sounds of four crisp packets interrupted the conversation.

“It’s an idea,” Mel mused, crunching. “Mr Isaacs asked Mrs Watson if we’d pop in and feed Matilda while he’s away.”

“Well, there you are,” Graham said.

“Tell you what, I’ll look into it for you, put together some sort of business plan.”

Mel leaned across and kissed him.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” she said.

When they got home, Mel’s early birthday present was still sitting on the table alongside her new blue glass.

The lilac stars had gone, of course.

Mrs Watson’s dog had tried to chew it, but managed to shred only one wrapper, and now it was in more traditional birthday costume of gold, black and silver, with fleur-de-lis and a cream chiffon bow.

“Well,” Graham said. “There it is. Aren’t you going to open it?”

“It is your birthday,” Jess said. “You are allowed.”

Mel looked at the present.

“Go on.” Tony chuckled. “Don’t keep us all in suspenders.”

“You’re right.” Mel reached across and pulled at the chiffon bow.

It really was a work of art. The gold paper opened exquisitely into a neat rectangle, and there, in the centre, sat the final box.

Taking a deep breath, Mel opened it.

Inside were three separate gifts.

The first was a beautiful 18-month diary. On the front was a note from Eunice.

Fill this.

The second gift was a tape measure.

Cautiously, Mel looked across at Graham. He was shaking his head.

As she unwound the tape, the words Pull this

appeared.

So she did. The tape stretched and stretched, like an elastic band, so she could measure whatever she wanted.

Mel started to laugh.

The third thing was a mystery. It was a large bag, with a drawstring at one end.

On the front, Eunice had pinned a note.

Forget this.

And that was it.

For a few moments they stood, just staring at it.

“What on earth is it?” Jess asked.

Mel held it up and turned it over, then inside out and back to front.

“Search me,” she said. “Well, it can’t be a toilet bag, or a make-up bag,” Jess said. “It’s too big. Besides, why would you want to forget that?”

Tony held it up to the light.

“Perhaps she wants you to take up magic.” He passed it to Graham. “Well,” he said, “knowing Eunice as I do, it’s probably the first component of a Do-it-yourself Forensics Kit, though for the life of me I can’t imagine what.”

Mel read the note again. “‘Forget this’,” she said. “What does it mean?” He shrugged.

“We’ll just have to wait till she gets in touch.”

The sound of the doorbell stunned them into silence.

“It can’t be!” Jess breathed.

Mel peered through the window and smiled.

“What did I tell you?”

****

“Do tell us,” Mel begged. “We’re simply dying of curiosity.”

A very bronzed Eunice looked up from her tea. “Tell you what, dear?” “The present,” Mel said. “What’s the bag for?”

“The bag?”

Jess whisked it up from the table and waved it. “This!”

“Oh, that.” Eunice started to laugh. “Come with me.”

Scooping up the bag, she led them to the bathroom, where she picked up the scales, slipped them into the bag and pulled the drawstring tight.

“There we go!”

She placed them back on the floor.

“Now, forget those! Fill your life, and stop worrying about calories.

“You can start by coming with me to the States.”

Riffling through her handbag, she pulled out two tickets, then kissed

Mel on both cheeks.

“Happy birthday, dear,” she said. “Now, I really must be off. Another flight to catch!”

****

“You have to admit, it is an amazing present,” Jess said, as they walked the dogs through the park the following morning. “When are you off?”

“Probably in May.” Mel sighed. “Depends on Graham’s work.”

“You don’t seem very excited. I’d be over the moon!”

“Oh, I am,” Mel replied. “I can’t wait. I’m just wondering how I’m going to resist all those doughnuts.”

The End.