Feeling Retro

This amusing short story of a family mystery is by Lesley-Anne Johnston.

was unclear why he would offer to mow the lawn in the first place, never mind using the oldest equipment possible to do so. This wasn’t like Charlie at all.

“Why aren’t you out there helping him?” she asked.

“I tried to. I’m more than capable of mowing my own lawn. He said he wanted to do it for me.

“When I told him there was an easier way, he said he was feeling retro.”

Diana stared at her son through the window. She had heard him use this expression before, when he announced his wish to have milk and eggs delivered direct from the dairy again.

Diana was perfectly happy buying her milk from the supermarket, especially considering how easy it was to order online and have the supermarket deliver it for her along with the rest of the weekly shop.

Charlie didn’t remember what it was like to have milk delivered at the crack of dawn.

The howl of the milk cart had often woken the sleeping child who, pulled from his peaceful dreams, imagined it was some wandering spook.

Many a morning had started early as a result.

Not to mention how exposed to the elements the bottles were, especially when the birds got to them, pecking at the foil tops to get to the layer of cream underneath.

Having to bring frozen milk in during a harsh winter had been anything but convenient, either.

The fact her son could even remember when milk was delivered to the doorstep puzzled Diana. What puzzled her more was why he felt the need to revive the tradition now. Neither she nor Steven had indicated they might be feeling nostalgic.

“I’ll keep an eye on him,” she said.

This behaviour was out of character, and Diana was determined to get to the bottom of it.

****

Stepping on to an area of freshly cut grass, Diana opened a folding chair and sat down with a magazine.

“Don’t mind me,” she told Charlie. “Just enjoying the sun. I won’t get in the way.”

He stopped what he was doing and leaned against the handle of the lawnmower, breathing heavily.

“No probs.” He scanned the street up and down.

“You would get the job done faster with the new mower, you know.” Diana kept her eyes fixed on her magazine, attempting nonchalance.

“I know. I’m feeling retro.” There it was again. Why? What had happened in her son’s life to fuel his urge for a simpler lifestyle?

The sound of heels hitting the pavement interrupted her thoughts.

“Hi, Diana. Hey, Charlie!” Diana looked up to see Kitty, their neighbour, leaning over the fence.

“You look busy,” Kitty said to Charlie.

Red in the face, he managed a weak smile.

“Anything to help Mum and Dad.”

Diana suppressed an urge to snort.

“My dad has a lawn mower,” Kitty said, spying the heap of junk Charlie was using. “I’m sure he would let you borrow it. It might make the job easier.”

“That’s kind of you, Kitty,”

Diana said cheerfully.

“We also have a modern lawnmower Charlie could be using, but he’s feeling retro today.”

Charlie shot his mother a withering stare.

“Oh,” Kitty said slowly “Well, have fun, then.”

Giving a friendly wave, Kitty made her way down the street, with Charlie watching her as she went.

Diana folded her chair up and made her way back into the house.

“Any idea what’s up with him, then?” Steven asked as she made herself comfortable on the sofa again.

“Yes,” she replied. “Kitty is what’s wrong with him.”

Steven laughed as the realisation of what Diana meant dawned on him.

Kitty was new to the area, having only moved in with her parents recently.

She was often spotted tottering down the street, dressed in 1940s-style fashion, her hair set on her head in victory rolls.

Their son, clearly smitten, seemed to be emulating her style.

“You mean to say the whole retro thing is to impress Kitty?”

Steven stared at their son, who was still fighting with the lawnmower.

“He knows, doesn’t he?” “That Kitty only dresses like Vera Lynn because she works in the Home Front museum? No, clearly not.” Steven laughed.

“Oh, to be young and in love.”

“Are you going to tell him or will I?” Diana asked,

“You can. But wait until he finishes the garden. He might be feeling retro, but I’m feeling lazy.”

There must have been a reason why Charlie was doing chores the hard way!

The End.