Women’s names for their husbands tend to reflect their partner’s DIY abilities around the house

tions which get straight to the heart of the matter. Women have an unerring talent for doing that. Consistently popular are names drawn from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs such as Sleepy, Dopey and Grumpy, or in some cases an amalgam of all three.

Women’s names for their husbands also tend to reflect their partner’s DIY abilities around the house and general input into the maintenance of the home. In this respect, the word ‘useless’ is a recurring theme.

This is particularly popular with those women who have been married “too long”.

Variations are ‘The Great Useless One’, the ‘Big Fat Useless One’ or plain ‘Useless’.

If you’re still struggling to come up with a convincing name that encapsulates all the charm of your partner, it always helps to go in for bit alliteration – so the ‘Bat with Bingo Wings’ for her and for him, the ‘Limp Lump’ is very effective.

Add into the alliterative mix a name based on your residency and you have the ‘Harridan from Hampton’, the ‘Wisbech Witch’ or, for him, the ‘Bretton Belly’.

Interestingly, some men opt for doggy names for their partners.

In the early days of a relationship they could be the ‘Puppy’, ‘Pooch’ or ‘Poodle’ which is quite endearing.

But when they’re no longer a man’s best friend they will morph into ‘The Rottweiler’.