Feedback - Is It a Friend or Foe?

The best thing about my job is that I get invited out to lovely places to eat; the worst thing about my job is that I get invited out to lovely places to eat.

Allow me to elaborate that statement. I love eating out at beautiful restaurants and getting all glammed, especially if it is for a good cause.

What I don’t always like is when people ask me how the food is? I never know what to say, should I give constructive criticism about the toughnessof the naan or the dry texture of the lamb bhuna or do I give “fake feedback?”

Case in point, last week I attended a Diwali charity event in a swanky London hotel. I donated private dining experience (which I am so pleased raised £9000!). We were treated to the finest Indian cuisine that London has to offer. The food arrived in a beautiful gold thali filled with an array of aromatic dishes. As soon as the first morsel hit my taste buds, the guest next to me asked me: “so Parveen, what do you think of the food?” I wasn’t quite sure what to say...Do I comment on the softness of the naan or the tenderness of the lamb bhuna?

Then I remembered having a conversation with a well-known Indian TV chef and he said that he does not comment on other people’s food when he is out. He just says it’s all nice. So, I took a leaf out of his book, smiled and said: “Oh, it’s delicious” which was not too far from the truth.

Then dessert arrived, my favourite course. It was pistachio cream and ghulab jaman tart. It was so divine, so no fake feedback necessary. Phew!...What a relief!

I have learnt to make friends with feedback and see it as a way of improving what I am doing, especially when I am filming a live show. However, in terms of “food feedback” things can get quite tricky.

Do people really want feedback? Or are they wanting a compliment or just seeking approval?

It’s a bit like when I get all glammed up and ask my husband how I look. I suppose I am looking for a compliment and sometimes I even get one...or is he just giving me fake feedback?

Anyway, Tuesday night I went to a new local restaurant opening – The Gurha Durbaar opened in the city centre. After the starters, including, momos and chilli chicken, lamb kebabs were served, and the owner came over and asked for feedback. I heard a little voice in my head saying “just say it’s nice, just say it’s nice,” but before I could put my brain into gear, I opened my mouth and said: “the chicken was a little too spicy and the kebabs lacked seasoning and I needed more dip”.

Oh dear, my “foot in mouth disease” had returned. As I whincingly waited for his reaction, he smiled and said he appreciated my honesty. After a sigh of relief, I asked what was for dessert?

Out came some pineapple and cheese sticks with a cherry – l looked at my friend and said: “should I give him feedback?”