Cabaret artist Reuben Kaye

What’s the last piece of clothing you bought?

Who even buys clothes anymore? I just pick up whatever the Argentinian men’s water polo team left on my bedroom floor and wear that. I tend to wear a lot of Speedos and shame.

What are you addicted to buying?

I don’t know if I should put that in print.

Best ever bargain?

My maid.

Who has great style?

Anyone who doesn’t give a crap about the opinions of anyone else.

Name your favourite high street shop.

I love any shop where the teardrops of the Bangladeshi children who made the sale stock are included in the ambient soundtrack.

Any fashion disasters you’d care to tell us about?

One night I stared at a Missoni dress too long and had an aneurysm. I woke up three days later in a charity shop in Argyll. I had a price tag on my toe.

What’s your favourite item in your wardrobe?

I never put my favourite things in the dark. They’re out for everyone to see. n