Full of beans, glitter and glitz, but short on heart and festive glow

Jack and the Beanstalk

SECC, Glasgow

IT’S touch and go, in the big annual panto at the SEC, whether Jack will ever make it up to the giant’s castle in the sky. The good fairy – Spirit of the Beans – has no idea how to make it happen, since her magic only works down on Earth; and everyone else, from the King to Jack’s daft brother Gary, is equally short of ideas.

So when the beans finally work their magic, and Jack ascends the giant beanstalk into the castle, it should be a big moment, with the panto audience cheering him to the echo; but instead, at the SEC, he’s greeted with a blank silence, as the audience chomps on its interval icecream, and waits for someone more interesting to appear.

Making the titular hero or heroine matter, even if only slightly, is a key part of successful panto-making; and it’s so completely absent, in this

Greg Mchugh – Gary Tank Commander – gives a storming and funny performance as Jack’s naughty brother