ON TWITTER

#TRUMPUKVISIT

Donald Trump and First Lady Melania met the Queen on the first day of their state visit to the UK – after backing Boris Johnson for the Tory leadership and branding the Duchess of Sussex “nasty”.

@ameliacd said: “News just in: a 6’3 slab of sentient chlorinated chicken with badly dyed yellow feathers has entered the UK.”

@zubairzakir added: “No red carpet = most subtle #British burn ever ”

@ajb2323 commented: “Remarkably, there are fewer people along The Mall for #Trumpukvisit than there would be on a day without anyone visiting. Tremendously unpopular here.”

@Edwardjdavey was scathing: “Trump is not our friend; we DO NOT befriend far right or their agents. The Queen would be perfectly entitled to cancel Trump dinner given he’s insulted The Duchess of Sussex & interfered in selection of our next PM at time of national crisis.”

@Drbeaubeaumont added: “I’m not saying Prince Charles wants rid of the tangerine menace as soon as is humanly possible, but he’s allowed 15 minutes for tea: which in British terms is barely enough time to discuss the football at the weekend. Camilla won’t even need to get out the hobnobs.”

#LEWISCHESSMEN

A long-lost Lewis Chessman had been unknowingly kept in a drawer by an Edinburgh family. The family’s grandfather, an antiques dealer, bought the piece for £5 in 1964.

@Macqueenhector said: “Only one knight and three warders (rooks, or castles) to go . . .”

@Kirkisajerk added: “Oh, I wonder if the rare chess piece I keep in my drawer that looks suspiciously like one of the Lewis chessmen is, in fact, one of the Lewis chessmen? I just keep it in there because I like how it looks suspiciously like one of the Lewis chessmen.”

@Kevin_macneil joked: “Doesn’t surprise me it took so long for that Lewis chesspiece to turn up. I went for a meal with a chess fanatic once – took her 35 minutes to pass the salt”

@Alison_edits felt sentimental: “The Lewis chessmen are one of my favourite ever museum exhibits. I bet he’s going to be happy to be reunited with his friends.”

And @exitthelemming was keen to keep looking: “What we need is a 12th century sofa to look down the back of.”