I’d pushed myself too far
Former Gogglebox star Steph Parker tells Gabrielle Fagan how a health crisis made her realise she had to look after herself as well as the family
Steph Parker can’t really recall being “minutes from death” after developing double pneumonia.
“I had started going a bit mad because I had no oxygen in my system. I didn’t realise how seriously ill I was because when you are that sick, you don’t know what’s going on at all,” says Parker, 52, who found fame with her husband Dom as Gogglebox’s hugely entertaining, witty and boozy armchair critics.
The couple run a Kent B&B as well as juggling their radio and TV commitments (they quit Gogglebox in late-2016) and have two children – daughter, Honor, 15, and 18-year-old son Max, who is autistic and severely epileptic.
“Life’s very busy – I also help my sister with our father, who has dementia – and sometimes I feel my feet never touch the ground,” adds Parker, whose health crisis happened at Christmas. “I think with the festivities on top, I’d pushed myself too far and it was just sheer exhaustion that allowed infection in.
“I’d had a bad cough and felt run down but I just got worse very quickly. Dom called an ambulance on Boxing Day. The paramedics told him that if I’d been left another 20 minutes, I might have died. My lungs had given up and I was rushed to intensive care and pumped full of antibiotics. I got an infection in my heart so I was kept in a while longer, but thankfully I got through it all.
“It’s taken months to get over it – not just the illness but the shock. I still get tired quite easily but apart from that, there’s no lasting effect,” explains Parker, who alongside Dom, has teamed up with Boots UK to promote its new online prescription service.
“Life’s hectic enough running around trying to get things done. The Boots service is brilliant because it takes all the work out of one chore – getting a prescription. It can be sent direct to your doctor or a local chemist.”
“I’ve been very good at looking after everybody else but not paid much attention to my own care. This has definitely shaken me up, it was very close to going disastrously wrong, and I know now it’s important,” she adds. “If I break down then everyone else around me breaks. I have to take responsibility for my health for the sake of myself and the family.”
This is something she has
heightened awareness of because of Max’s needs.
Constant seizures since he was four have left him with a mental age of six, and they live in constant dread he will one day have a fatal seizure. The couple bravely revealed his condition for the first time earlier this year in a moving Channel 4 documentary,
Steph & Dom: Can Cannabis Save
Our Son? Some research has shown that medical marijuana/cbd may effectively control certain seizures, but there is controversy over allowing the treatment in the UK. Two months ago, Max joined an “early access” programme and is receiving treatment over 20 weeks.
Parker is emotional as she reveals Max recently gave Dom a “huge hug, a proper hug. That’s never happened before in 18 years because Max doesn’t like to be touched. Dom was so shocked he nearly fell to the ground.
“I’ve never had a hug, never. All I’ll get is a headbutt in my chest, so to see him spontaneously run up to Daddy and put his arms around him was unbelievable. It was amazing and made both of us cry. Since he’s been on the treatment – we’re about halfway through – there’s definitely been an improvement in his mental awareness.”
They’ve also noticed improvement in his communication. “His speech is very poor but at the moment we’re getting full sentences and he’s using the right words. We’re staggered as we’ve never had that before.”
Wary after so many years of dashed hopes, she’s determined not to become over-excited however. “We have to manage our expectations. This treatment is one in a long line of things that have been tried and it may have no (permanent) effect. I have to be clear about that, otherwise you just get your heart broken every five minutes.”
There’s no trace of self-pity in this warm, down-to-earth woman, who explains that humour is the shield she and Dom, 53, use to help them cope with life’s challenges and their worry about Max, who can suffer up to 120 seizures a day.
“We laugh every day. We have to – not because we’re irreverent, disrespectful, or thoughtless, but because it’s the glue that holds us together and keeps us from being very sad,” she says.
She describes reliving what they’ve gone through for the documentary as a “giant step”.
“It was very hard and moving, but we hoped that if we could use being well-known to go public with his story and move things forward, and help Max and all the other youngsters that suffer, it was worth it.”
The couple – first spotted in 2013 on Channel 4’s Four In A Bed reality show about B&B owners – were a hit on Gogglebox, which launched their showbiz career. They now host a show on Talk Radio and are filming a new Channel 4 series on couples changing their lives to run country B&BS.
She looks back on Gogglebox –the couple dubbed themselves “the
P **** d Posh Couple” – with affection but doesn’t miss it.
“We’d said all we had to say and it was time to move on. It has to be kept fresh with different people.”
Parker adds with a smile: “When we’re not working, we still like to spend most of our time curled up in front of the telly with a large glass of red. Come to think of it, that would be my ideal exit from life – I’d like to close my eyes and go to sleep and not spill my red!”
Steph Parker is partnering with Boots UK to launch its new, improved Free Online NHS Repeat Prescription Service, helping time-stretched
families manage their medication needs. Download the Boots app or visit Boots.com/nhs for more information
“It’s taken months to get over it – not just the illness but the shock. I still get tired”