The real shock? It’s a hit

WOW, we are really into flying-pigs territory here! Who’d have thought? The the inventor of kidneycrushing body con dresses, the wearer of toothpick jeans, the woman who is the toast of New York Fashion Week (what am I thinking, these women don’t do gluten!) has come up with a new, affordable collection that is not just for stick insects and children, but for plus-size women! The Victoria Beckham collection for American chain Target goes up to a UK size 24, and is affordable, too, with nothing over £33. And here’s another shock: it’s gorgeous! Eye-popping colours – orange, lemon, shocking pink – when bigger women have always been told to wear black. Fabulous detail, such as slimming sleeves, and drop waists. Super fabrics – not too thin, as that shows every bump.

And the ‘straight’ pieces (fashion-speak for anyone under a size 14) are fab, too: the trousers are slouchy and over-long; I’d buy the hot pink trouser suit, and the embellished black bomber jacket. And the childrenswear, my God, I only wish I’d gone through childbirth! Lovely retro ginghams and paisleys, scalloped hems and collars, shorts, prim dresses...

I was an early critic, but VB’s learned her market, grown, developed. These will fly off the shelves. Just like those pigs.

The collection launches on April 9, with selected pieces available at victoriabeckham.com.