Hate your wife’s friends? You’re twice as likely to split

FORGET chocolates and flowers, gentlemen – the key to a happy marriage may be as simple as getting on with your wife’s friends.

A new study reveals that husbands who disapprove of their wife’s chums are twice as likely to get divorced.

However, women do not have to like their husband’s friends for their marriage to survive.

Researchers believe that women are less willing to give up their friends – even when they are disliked by their husbands. In contrast, men will ditch people if their wives do not like them.

Women are also more likely to discuss marital problems with friends, which increases the risk of marriage difficulties and divorce. The study, by researchers at Adelphi University and other centres in the United States, tracked 400 couples over a 16-year period to compare the risk of divorce with the couples’ attitudes to spouses’ friends. In the first year, couples were asked if their spouse had friends who they would rather they did not spend time with. Couples were asked the next year about interference from friends.

The results show that 44 per cent of wives and 29 per cent of husbands said their spouse had pals with whom they would rather he or she did not spend time.

They also show that the more husbands disapproved of their wife’s friends, the greater the risk of divorce over the following 16 years, even after other factors were taken into account. Writing in the Journal Of Social And Personal Relationships, the researchers said: ‘Wives may turn to friends for solutions to problems, including marital issues, and their husbands may perceive these social interactions as interfering in their marriage if they do not approve of these friends.’

One of the authors, Dr Amy Rauer, said: ‘Although having a larger support network can be beneficial, merging two separate sets of family and friends can be a challenging process for couples.’