The Strictly love cheats’ Charleston ( just don’t mention THAT kiss...)
Liz Jones tunes in as Katya and Seann face the music
IT WAS the moment millions of Britons twitched a metaphorical lace curtain to witness the walk of shame – or to be more precise, the Charleston of Cheating.
All eyes were on Strictly’s naughty couple – comedian Seann Walsh and his professional partner Katya Jones – last night as they took to the floor for the first time since THAT kiss.
BBC bosses had mooted Jones might swap the habitual skimpy outfit for a scratchy tweed skirt suit. In the end she was in red shorts and a striped top: the Strictly equivalent of a burka.
Was either one blushing? Did Seann say, Patrick Swayze-fashion: ‘This is my dance space. This is your dance space’? Did he have two left feet as well as two n’s?
In the end, it was all a bit Stalinist Russia. The sorry story of their illicit smooch was deleted, with the only reference Claudia’s quip that ‘It’s been a quiet week’, and Tess’s response: ‘Apart from the odd headline.’
No one had thought to sort Seann’s wet-look perm, which makes me wonder how he snared Katya to kiss him in the first place.
The reception from the audience was warm, but we all know the Strictly crowd are habitually prodded into action with tepid wine and biscuit bribes.
And the dance? We had to wait till 8.16pm, which made me think the BBC wanted to eke it all out, and for us not to disappear to put on the kettle.
In the end, it was quite physical, but not in a remotely sexy way: like watching extrovert siblings wrestling.
‘That was brave,’ said Tess, when they’d finished. And she was right. They had more front than Blackpool!
Darcey Bussell thought Seann clumsy. You can say that again. It was his girlfriend’s birthday!
Everyone seemed to be patting these two love birds on the back, which was strange, given the pain you feel when your loved one cheats.
Sources backstage said that Seann had been ‘shaking like a leaf’ before taking to the floor.
One said: ‘It was touch-and-go as to whether Seann would be able to dance. He was absolutely petrified, he was beside himself with fear.
‘He has talked through the repercussions of not taking part but decided he could do it. He was shaking like a leaf.’
Sorry Seann, I’ve got no sympathy. There is no way I can condone this.
He and Katya might be all smiley and covered in glitter, but to be honest, the show just got very dark indeed.
Will the canoodling couple be voted off tonight? They got 28 points, which meant they are safe.
Could we please chuck rotten eggs at Katya instead?
And forcibly remove a consonant from Sean(n)?
It would make a nation of cuckolded women very happy indeed…