Posh retreat spotted my secret health problem
BADEN-BADEN is famous for it’s thermal spas – frequented by Napoleon, Queen Victoria and Marlene Dietrich – and, more recently, for having hosted games in the 2006 World Cup.
Remember those pictures of an army of glamorous WAGs strutting down a cobbled street? That was Baden-Baden.
And more recently, it has been Victoria Beckham’s bolthole following husband David’s ‘shock’ revelation that being married with four children was occasionally hard work.
Tucked away on the edge of Germany’s Black Forest, the town is home to Brenners, the grande dame of European spa hotels – where Posh stayed.
Here lie state-of-the-art medical facilities and ten-star luxury. I was invited to stay earlier this year and to have a full health MOT with on-site holistic expert, Dr König.
Having spent a long weekend at the sprawling estate, which overlooks the River Oos, I can see why Posh headed here for some ultra-discreet R&R.
My own experience was an eye-opener as the exhaustive tests flagged up a medical condition I had no idea about.
THE PROBLEM
NEXT year, I turn 40. And I have to say, I have never felt better. I eat a balanced diet, I don’t drink often and I don’t smoke. I do exercise regularly. But, as Dr König – about 6ft 4in, with movie-star teeth – explains: ‘We are interested in getting you to optimum health. What’s going on inside, and how can we keep you healthy in your 50s, 60s and beyond.’ Well, book me in.
THE SOLUTION
THE Brenners medical facility, Villa Stephanie, is an imposing white stucco Georgian building on the estate connected to the main building via a network of tunnels. Most guests stay at the hotel but, for ultimate discretion, you can take up residence – as Posh did – in one of the luxurious rooms in the villa which are insulated to cut out all electromagnetic radiation from wi-fi, mobile phones and, well, wherever else electromagnetic radiation comes from. This helps guests ‘fully detox’ from the outside world.
The medical area includes treatment rooms, a dental clinic, and a cosmetic medical practice.
THE TREATMENT
MY MOT begins with a series of tests and records my blood pressure, heart rate and body composition – how much fat, muscle, bone and water I’m made up of. Bloods are also taken. The next day, I return for my first appointment with Dr König. ‘If we find any areas of risk, we help you to improve your health in specific ways,’ he says.
He takes a thorough medical history before performing an examination – testing my reflexes and flexibility – and I’m given an ultrasound test to check the liver, kidneys, heart, and blood vessels in the neck, to look for any furring.
He also ultrasounds my thyroid gland and finds some small cysts on it. The thyroid, in the neck, regulates hormones that control the metabolism. These small pockets of fluid are ‘a variation of normal’ and ‘nothing to worry about’ but I should visit an endocrinologist, I’m told.
On my final day, I come back for my results. ‘You are in good shape,’ says Dr König. ‘So we are searching for perfection now.’
Gosh, well, that was worth the price alone. My iron levels, although normal, could be higher, so he prescribes a supplement. And that’s about it. On my return, I do visit a doctor: there is one cyst that ‘might be worth keeping an eye on’ as these can grow, and in rare cases become cancerous. Forewarned is forearmed.
ANYTHING ELSE?
THE best thing about Brenners is that it’s in Baden-Baden. When I’m not being probed by Dr König, I wander the cobbled streets and there are hikes through the surrounding forest, where there are ruined castles to explore. One evening I head to Friedrichsbad, the historic thermal baths. Bathing costumes are strictly prohibited, and I receive a very bracing ‘massage’ involving a scrubbing brush.
Single rooms from £238 a night, doubles from £317, including breakfast. Consultations with Dr König start at £134. oetkercollection.com