Everyone should have a film crew following them asking... ‘How do you feel about your own death?’
TOP MATHEMATICIAN TV PRESENTER AND PODCASTER HANNAH FRY TELLS MARION MCMULLEN ABOUT DEALING WITH CANCER WITH A CAMERA CREW IN TOW
You missed a smear test during the pandemic and were later told you had cervical cancer and needed radical surgery to survive. How are you doing now?
I’m acutely aware of the fact that I am one of the lucky ones and am able to tell the tale.
I don’t recommend it as a life strategy, but to go through something like that focuses you and helps you in your life. I am less concerned about things and more aware of what is important.
I had just had a baby at the time and your body is all over the place then and I guess I just dismissed any symptoms as that. It was only later that I really connected the dots.
I think that, to be honest, the whole thing felt like a slap in the face. It was so quick and so shocking. People often say they are left reeling when they get a cancer diagnosis and that’s exactly what it felt like. I was concerned for my future and for my two little girls.
You filmed your experience and it has now been turned into a BBC documentary. What was it like watching the footage back?
I started writing a diary to try and get my thoughts in order and have a record of the time and then I started filming everything and it just felt like a natural extension.
A friend has a TV company and, we didn’t know what going to happen – the story could have ended very quickly – but we decided to make a documentary.
I wanted to watch the first edit on my own in case I needed to put my head in a pillow and scream if I couldn’t get through it all.
About eight of us sat down to see it in the end. They were all watching me and I just had a notebook in my hands and kept scribbling.
The whole experience was like really, really intense therapy. (Laughs) Everyone should have a film crew following them around asking questions like ‘How do you feel about your own death?”
You describe yourself as an all-round bada** on your website. Is that how you feel now?
(Laughs) It’s becoming more of a reality. It’s like the saying ‘fake it ‘till you make it’. I’m back doing the podcasts and everything.
I get lots of messages from young girls saying thing like that have made a difference to them and that’s so lovely to hear.
(Laughs) The people that recognise me are my people – I’m the nerd – and I have some lovely, lovely conversations with them. I love doing the podcast and talking about all these amazing stories.
It’s like finding a really good bit of gossip that you want to share with everyone.
What is one of your favourite facts?
I read lots of science books and I discovered that no-one has any idea how eels are born – and they have tried really, really hard to find out. It’s completely mental.
I do the BBC Radio 6 show with Lauren Laverne and we were talking about it. They keep them in tanks, but no eels have ever been born in captivity. They only breed in one particular place in the ocean and they only know that because they have seen juvenile eels in the area, but no-one has ever seen them actually born. (Laughs) I don’t want to bore you with eel facts, but when I come across something like that I just want to share it.
You’ve have made programmes about the mathematics of love and artificial intelligence. Do you think it has helped to change people’s idea of mathematicians?
I think some people imagine mathematicians come out of the womb that way. I have always been quite a logical person, I think very rationally, and I really like challenges.
I don’t mind being frustrated or uncomfortable when things are hard. It does not put me off. It just makes me more determined and I think those are successful qualities in a mathematician.
Everyone is different, but everyone has the ability if they are willing to practise and get over the fear of maths.
What are you plans for the future?
I don’t feel like I’m living with a shadow over me any more. I’m filming a new BBC 2 series and, in fact, there is lots and lots of filming this year. It’s nice to be back out there.
■ Making Sense Of Cancer With Hannah Fry can be seen on BBC2 at 9pm on
Thursday and is available on iplayer. Go to hannahfry.co.uk for podcast and radio details.
People often say they are left reeling when they get a cancer diagnosis and that’s exactly what it felt like. I was concerned for my future and for my two little girls.