Blue found an angel in her darkest hour
BEING told you have breast cancer is a hammer blow.
For Fife woman Blue White, it left her utterly terrified, just a quaking wreck. But help came in the smallest of forms – her first great-granddaughter Nova.
She calls her “my wee saviour”, the critical focus for the future.
And last week Blue – known as that by everyone, not her given name Beatrice – had a successful first anniversary check.
The photographer is now putting her moving words and pictures together for a book she hopes will help others through one of the toughest times in anyone’s life.
It’s just 14 months since Blue, 62, went for the routine mammogram that was to become anything but.
“You get invited to them every three years when you’re over 50 and I was just lucky that mine was due last year and caught it when it did,” said Blue, who also works in an after-school club.
“I’d never missed one and I was laughing and joking with the nurses, never thinking for a moment this one would be different.”
A few days later, just hours before she was heading to Italy on her first foreign trip for years, came the letter asking her to get in touch.
Panicking, she called immediately and an appointment was arranged for after the holiday which she spent fretting and anxious.
“The minute the consultant came in after the scans and biopsy I could see by her face something was amiss,” said the Glenrothes gran in this, Breast Cancer Awareness Month.
“She put her hand on top of mine, said it was breast cancer and I would need surgery and radiotherapy.
“At that point I almost felt relieved because she hadn’t said chemotherapy. But hearing the news was the worst thing that’s ever been said to me.”
Although Blue already knew that she was going to be a great-gran, her daughter called the night before to try and cheer her up with the news that she was having a little girl. And that was to have a massive impact.
“Knowing that was what got me through my treatment. You try to be big and brave, but when I was on my own you have times when you’re absolutely terrified and wonder if you’ll be here to see your great-grandchild.
“I needed something to cling on to and the thought of that baby was it.”
Blue had two lumpectomy surgeries to tackle all of the cancer and, she admitted, the past year had been “pretty rubbish really.”
However, she was helped immeasurably by Breast Cancer Care’s Moving Forward course. It put Blue together with other patients who were able to lend support and share their experiences.
And it’s sharing her own experiences that she’s looking to do with her book.
“Some of the stuff you see is absolutely horrendous,” she added.
“I’ve kept a diary of what I went through and felt and took photographs. What I’ve learned is that after this you get back to a new normal.”
www.breastcancercare.org.uk 0808 800 6000