Lay down some rules or spiteful bedroom bullies will cause a world of pain
Anyone who has been bullied knows how it destroys your confidence.
One cruel, cutting remark can hurt deeply and, if it continues, it can rock your belief in who you are and how others perceive you.
That’s tough at any point in life – but during childhood and teenage years it’s especially damaging.
University of St Andrews researchers have been looking at the prevalence of bullying in Scottish schools over the past 20 years and last week revealed that there had been a big increase in cyberbullying.
The number of children reporting being victimised has risen – particularly among girls.
This is worrying because we know teenage girls are particularly vulnerable to comments about their physical appearance, clothes, popularity and ability to attract boys.
It was bad enough back in the day when a sneering look or a caustic remark could ruin your confidence. But social media means nasty jibes can go viral quickly, destroying a girl’s self-confidence.
Dr Alina Cosma, a research fellow at the uni’s school of medicine, said: “Female victims were more likely to report less confidence and happiness, and more psychological complaints.”
So what can parents do about it?
We are all becoming more alert and aware about the dangers of unsupervised access to social media.
Yes, there are lots of benefits to having a computer. It helps with homework, while allowing people to keep in touch.
But this useful tool of modern life has its dark side if used unwisely and it’s up to parents to ensure that it’s not being used in a way which could harm vulnerable children.
Make rules. Set limits about the time they can spend online. Talk to your kids about what they’re doing.
Know who their friends are. Be alert and aware of any changes in their mood. Help your children to learn how to navigate this new world of technology with a critical eye.
Try to remember what it felt like to be young. How a catty comment about your hair, the length of your skirt or a spot on your nose, a could make you feel terrible.
Imagine the cringe factor if your daughter knows that her classmates are reading about her and perhaps laughing at her? Every teenager’s nightmare.
No matter what age or stage we’re at in life we are still sensitive human beings and cyberbullying is a particularly effective way of damaging self-esteem.
Don’t let technology have too much importance in family life.
Press the off button from time to time and start a conversation – you might be surprised at finding out who your son or daughter is turning out to be.