By Justina Murray

Lasting mark left on families by those who abuse alcohol

We may not want to think about it but children are very aware of how the adults in their lives use and abuse alcohol and how it makes them feel.

A recent project by Scotland’s Children’s Parliament shone a stark light on the many ways in which children are exposed to alcohol as they go about their daily lives.

They highlighted the everyday and everywhere visibility of alcohol, from advertising and marketing on TV, billboards and online, shelves full of bottles and cans in their local shops, routine drinking and drunkenness, and of course drinking in the home. The children explained how their relationships with adults felt “compromised” when alcohol was involved, leaving them feeling sad, ignored, bored and scared.

Of course children are not the only ones affected by someone else’s drinking. At Scottish Families we also support adults who are concerned about their partner’s drinking, parents worried about their own children (including adult children), siblings seeking advice about their brother or sister, and young people anxious about parents’ alcohol use.

People affected by someone else’s drinking live with high levels of stress and anxiety, in a constant “fight or flight” state which, inevitably, effects their physical health as well. Family conflict and relationship breakdowns are commonplace, along with money worries as the household budget is diverted elsewhere.

But most of this is hidden from sight. “I blame the family” or “it’s all the family’s fault”are common (illinformed) accusations. It is estimated around 51,000 children live with a parent who is drinking at harmful levels. Last year, family members from every single local authority area in Scotland contacted us for support, with alcohol their most common concern – above cocaine, heroin, benzodiazepines, cannabis or any other drug.

Not everyone will manage to change their loved one’s drinking by pleading with them to not go to the pub (if only it were that easy), but supporting families is the perfect place to start if we want to reduce harm, promote recovery and ultimately save lives.

Justina Murray is CEO of Scottish Families Affected by Alcohol and Drugs