He wants you to know he’s safe

Dear June

My partner of 21 years suffered on-going health issues for years but had no idea how ill he was.

He died three weeks after a diagnosis. He badly wanted home from the hospital but sadly we only had two days together. Since he passed away there’s been an unusual smell in our bedroom. Is there any connection?

Valerie, Isle of Man. June Says

Those who we held a close, loving bond with will often try to let us know after their death that they are safe. This usually happens quite quickly after their passing and the most common of those signs are smells.

Some people might smell a specific perfume or a type of cigarette or pipe tobacco that could instantly be associated with a passed loved one. Some mothers who have lost children can at times get a familiar child smell that only a mother would recognise and this can be comforting for them to know they are close.

I do feel the smell in your bedroom would be connected with your partner and he is making an effort to try to let you know he is near.

You mentioned you did not think he “had any idea of how ill he was”. get a strong sense he knew more than you imagine, but was trying to protect you from it for as long as he could. He knows you did your best for him and even though you say he only got two days at home, he died in familiar, safe surroundings with you by his side and that was all he wanted at the end of his life.

I