Cafe group get-togethers are just our cup of tea
IT’S a Thursday morning in a sun-kissed coffee house in Falkirk and a group of people sit round tables, chatting and laughing.
Some have come alone, others are accompanied by a loved one.
A cruel fate has brought them together but by the time they leave around noon, they’ll each be feeling a little better and more positive about their situation.
This is a weekly dementia café, one of many in communities throughout the country – but don’t expect to hear much talk about the condition among attendees.
Rather than being depressing, where people moan about their illness, the gathering is relaxed and life-affirming.
“After my diagnosis I was content to sit in the house and never leave,” admits Tom Urquhart, from nearby Bonnybridge. He was diagnosed with vascular dementia three years ago at the age of 63.
“But the staff here made me realise I had a lot more to offer.
“Now I go out and talk to different groups and I’m a member of the Scottish DementiaWorking Group, which forwards ideas to Alzheimer Scotland about issues that affect us.
“The café allows us to network with staff and other folk in a similar position, especially newly diagnosed people, who we try to bolster a wee bit.”
Tom Urquhart, Iain McAlpine and Stephen & Kathy McGeachie all enjoy the cafe gatherings
Justine Davidson is one of the staff that Tom mentions.
She’s a dementia advisor and started the café in 2014. Initially it was monthly but proved so popular it was quickly changed to a weekly drop-in.
“We run an eight week post-diagnostic information course and, by the end of the programme, everyone had got to know each other and wanted to know how to continue catching up, so we established the café,” she explains.
“It started with eight people and now we have more than 20 coming along each week.
“Most have early stage dementia but some are at later stages.
“We run three or four of the postdiagnostic courses each year, so there are always new people coming in.
“It’s a social thing and not only helps them remain part of their communities but the peer suppor t gives them confidence to attend other groups.
“There’s a lot of humour here, as well as empathy and understanding. People get so much out of it.” Kathy McGeachie is one of those people. She attends the café with her husband Stephen, 79, who was diagnosed with mixed dementia two years ago.
The devoted couple, from Denny, celebrate their 56th wedding anniversary this year.
“Stephen is struggling to get his words out these days and it’s frustrating – for both of us,” Kathy says.
“We’ve been together so long and it’s tough not being able to have a conversation with him anymore.
“But he still helps me around the house with the dishes, hoovering and ironing, and every morning he gets up and does the crossword with my help. “We still love each other very much.” The gran- of- six adds: “It’s good to get
There’s a lot of humour here, as well as empathy and understanding
out of the house for a wee while and come along to the café and have a chat.”
Iain McAlpine, from Stenhousemuir, agrees.
“I get annoyed if I can’t make it along,” says the 60- year- old, who attends with wife Christine.
“The café is great and it’s good to just sit and chat without discussing our ailments.”
Iain retired from the police three years ago after 30 years of service that included working at the Lockerbie bombing trial in Amsterdam.
“Working with the police was the best