Francis Gay

GEORGE became all philosophical after giving his three-year-old granddaughter into trouble.

“Normally she’ll call me a few silly names, but when she was on the spot every sentence she spoke had the word ‘Papa’ in it at least twice,” he told me.

“It was as if she was trying to remind me of our relationship and that I was supposed to be loving her, not telling her off.

“And it worked! What would it be like, I wondered, if we were to put our relationships ahead of our self-interest in any dispute – calling each other husband, wife, brother, sister, neighbour, reminding us of who we were rather than letting anger blind us to those bonds? “Might we be kinder to each other?” Well, George, I don’t know. But, my friend, it’s worth trying. OK, George? CAMERON came in with bags of stuff for the food bank. He then put in several hours’ voluntary work then left, promising to come back again.

Rab said: “Last time I saw him he was taking food from us and selling it to feed his habit. I told him not to come back!”

Claire remembered that day, too. As he left she had talked with Cameron about the dire need in the area and how people who might not be well off were doing their best to meet that need.

“I told him those people cared for him and when he turned his life around maybe he could help others in return.”

Two conversations on the same day. Rab happily admitted Claire’s had borne the sweeter fruit. May we never allow anger to cause us to shut someone else down. Leave space for a better outcome.