Final words between us were said in anger

Dear June MY husband died five years ago.

He was killed in a road accident on his way home from work when he was running late. He was 47.

I had spoken to him earlier that day and was annoyed he could not leave work sooner as he knew we had plans for the evening.

I will never forget the feeling of dread as I opened the door to find the police on the doorstep.

The last words we spoke were in anger. Please tell him I’m sorry and I love him.

Rosemary, via email.

June Says

Everyone who has suffered a loss in an unforeseen tragedy will think back to their last conversation.

When we say goodbye to a loved one or friend, we take it for granted we will see them later, but that can never be guaranteed.

Arguments coupled with harsh words said in the heat of the moment are a part of everyday life. We do not really mean them and think it will be sorted out later once we’ve had time to mull things over.

For some, later never comes and the harsh words said can’t be taken back by either party.

Those words were not the cause of the tragedy but some will be left with feelings of terrible guilt because they were said in anger.

I sense a strong, sensitive character as your husband draws close. He avoided confrontational situations at all costs and was a loving family man who would go at his own pace and wouldn’t be hurried.

I’m drawn towards a younger male on this side of life who I feel carries his name. Do you both have a son?

I am being shown detailed black and white pictures created by pencil or charcoal – a picture of a bridge that looks quite dramatic as it stretches across the dark water.

Do you recognise this picture? I sense it to be of some significance.

I am made aware that your husband’s passing was very fast and the conditions were dark and cold. Was it in the winter months?

He wants you to know he is around you often in the home.

He tries to let you know he is close and I smell cigar smoke and know you can smell it too when he comes close.

Please know he will be there to comfort, support and love you both, always.

VERDICT

My husband was very much his own man and would go at his own pace.

We have a 19-year-old son who is named after him.

Our son attends art school and we have many of his pencil and charcoal drawings including the bridge picture.

His father was involved in an accident quite close to that particular bridge.

The accident occurred in January when traffic was detoured due to bad weather conditions.

I do, on occasion, smell his cigar smoke around our home, which gives me some comfort to know he is still close by.