I feel like Little Miss Grumpy... I just can’t shake this miserable mood. What’s wrong with me?

Dear Maggie

I don’t know what’s wrong with me but I’m miserable and bad-tempered all of the time.

My family are avoiding coming to see me because I’m so grumpy with them and I know people at work are starting to avoid me too.

My periods have become erratic and heavy and I don’t like myself very much right now.

My husband suggested that maybe it’s down to the menopause, which didn’t exactly go down well.

I just feel awful but I’m not sure what I can do.

Maggie says

I’m sorry you’re feeling low.

You may not want to hear this – but there is a chance that your husband could be right.

The mood swings you are experiencing are very typical of the early stages of the menopause. I’ve been there and it isn’t easy.

Suddenly you’re in the busy, demanding middle stage of your life, holding down a job, coping with a family and from day to day you feel tired, tense, irrational and irritated by the slightest little thing.

It’s as if a stranger has moved into your body and mind, taken up residence and is controlling your mood. One of the moments I’m less proud of in my life was the day my husband came in the back door from the garden to ask when lunch would be ready.

I was washing dishes at the kitchen sink and, for no good reason, shouted “get your own lunch”, picked up a mug from the sink and threw it at him.

He ducked, it went through the glass of the back door, smashed it and we both stood staring at the carnage.

We can laugh about it now – but there were moments when going through the menopause felt to me very similar to the mood swings of teenage years when the least little thing can irritate and get blown out of all proportion.

So I suggest you make an appointment with your GP and explain your physical symptoms, the changes in your monthly cycle, and also your feelings of irritability and low mood.

Just acknowledging it and talking about it can help.

He may prescribe medication which can also ease the symptoms.

You’ve taken the first step in facing up to the situation – and that’s important.

The menopause is called “the change” for a very good reason.

Go easy on yourself and remember – this too will pass.

Looking for practical advice, relationship help or emotional support? As a mum-of-four, grandmother-of-eight and dear friend to many, Margaret’s years of experience make her the ideal person to turn to with your worries