I’m a better mum now than I was in my 30s
Pregnancy advisor Tricia Murray, from Edinburgh, gave birth to her fourth child, Arthur, last year, age 40. She also has three other sons, an eight-year-old and 10-year-old twins.
My last pregnancy was actually my best pregnancy. I knew how to look after myself and how to look after my body, what to eat, when to rest.
I was fitter, I was healthier, just much more in tune.
And because I was older, I knew there were more risks so I didn’t feel guilty about looking out for myself.
In my job I work as a doula supporting women of all ages who are feeling overwhelmed by their situation so I had no qualms about having someone in to help me two mornings a week so I could take some time to myself.
Mums are so hard on themselves, thinking they have to do everything and be with their kids every minute they can, but it’s so important to look after yourself.
I am looking for a yoga class that Arthur and I can do together, not really for his benefit but because I want to get back to yoga.
I have also put him into nursery a couple of mornings a week from much earlier than I did with my other children so I get some head space.
It sounds selfish, but it actually means I’m more able to give to everyone else.
I think I’m a much better mum in my 40s than I was in my 30s. Having the twins was a steep learning curve.
We were always busy with music classes, sensory classes. I think I felt that I should be with them all the time.
I am more relaxed about everything now. I felt like, before, I never really got the opportunity to enjoy being a mum as I was in at the deep-end with three boys 22 months apart.
Having that life experience and knowing how quickly it goes… this time, I just want to enjoy every minute.