Fathers, trust your natural instincts

As a ‘wild’ parent, it is a joy to encourage my children’s bond with the great outdoors, says Ben Fogle

Becoming a father was the best thing that ever happened to me. Suddenly it wasn’t all about me (and my wife, Marina), but about these tiny little creations. Where once I sought experiences to shape me, I now aspire for opportunities to shape my children and create lasting family memories. I have variously been described as a dangerous father, a famous father and, more often, an absent father. The reality is that I’d prefer to be known as a wild father. It is a sad truth that my year is punctuated by long periods of absence while I trek across deserts with grumpy camels or live on remote Australian islands with Robinson Crusoe. “My daddy’s off to play with polar bears”, “My daddy’s off to swim with crocodiles”, “Daddy got bitten by a camel”, announces Ludo to his increasingly puzzled teacher, Miss Alice. My current favourite is: “My daddy caught a seal and it’s in the fridge.” He actually meant “eel”, but you get the point. The children – Ludo, aged three and half and his sister, Iona, just two – have a rattlesnake skin and a crocodile tooth in their bedroom, and their wall is one giant Velcro map of the world onto which they can place their “daddy” with an array of wild animals and modes of transport. I had a pretty “wild” childhood myself. I grew up above my father’s veterinary clinic and our house was not only full of our own animals, which included an African grey parrot called Humphrey, but any overnight patients. It’s probably an exaggeration, but I recall a Dr Dolittle childhood. We lived not far from London Zoo, where my father had once been the vet, and we regularly visited. We spent weekends in Sussex catching crabs in rock pools with my late grandfather and fishing in the River Arun, followed by endless idyllic summers in the Canadian lakes where my grandparents lived in a wooden cottage. Grandpa was an ox of a man. He built his house by hand and could lift a car on his own. But more importantly, he taught me the value of nature and the environment. I would spend the summers catching insects, worms and fishing. More important to me than almost anything is that my own children have a bond with the wild. Recent research has revealed a frightening disconnection with the outdoors and nature for many youngsters growing up in a world of technology and concrete. New parenthood can be frightening, and I understand firsthand the tendency to mollycoddle and wrap in cotton wool, but Marina and I have made a concerted effort to break the chains of instinct and fly free. We embrace mud, worms and rain. This attention to nature seems to be working. Ludo has become obsessed with insects: “I love you,” he said to a small writhing worm in the palm of his hand the other day. Recently at a friend’s wedding, Ludo insisted on holding his new “pet” woodlouse, which now makes a star appearance in the wedding photographs. There was no clown or bouncy castle for Ludo’s third birthday, but a visit from exotic animals, including a baby crocodile. Despite the croc being under the strict control of its handler, half the west London children were terrified. Ludo wanted to hug it. He also wanted to bring the skunk home with him, but Marina wasn’t so sure. It has always been important to me that my children understand their place in the world. Perspective is such an important ingredient in life that I have been fortunate to experience Farms/wildlife There are farms to visit and look at animals, and there are farms where you can get involved, holding chicks and feeding the lambs. Farmer Palmer’s Farm in Poole, Dorset (farmerpalmers.co.uk), offers the opportunity to bottle-feed lambs and hand-feed tame deer. Greenmeadow CommunityFarm in Cwmbran, Wales, is a working farm with a wide range of rare pedigree animals to see (greenmeadow communityfarm.org.uk). The British Wildlife Centre in Lingfield, Surrey, gives talks on foxes, otters, Scottish wildcats, badgers and red squirrels, with the chance to see these native species close up (britishwildlifecentre.co.uk). Coasteering A mixture of swimming, climbing and scrambling along our coastline – and, when safe, jumping into the sea. Key areas for this activity include Newquay in Cornwall, north and south Devon, Wales and Scotland. See coasteering.org. Newquaybased Hot Rock Coasteer offers kids’ adventure trips (hotrockcoasteer.co.uk). Via Ferrata Meaning “Iron Way”, this is an amazing journey across the Honister Crag in the Lake District, using fixed iron footholds and handholds. Book through keswickadventurecentre.co.uk (suitable for older children). Go Ape There are now29 Go Ape tree-top adventures in Britain. Set in forests around the country, they offer zip-wires, Tarzan swings andwalkways for all ages. “Baboons” have to be 1.4m (4ft 7in) or taller, aged 10-17 to take part (£24); Junior Adventurers over 1m(3ft 3in), aged six and above, cost £16; Fathers (Gorillas) aged 18+ cost £30-£32. For more details see goape.co.uk. WWTThe Wildfowl and Wetlands Trust organises pond-dipping for leeches, snails and water boatmen. There are nine wetland nature reserves around the country (see wwt.org.uk). Kayaking An exhilarating ride for all the family. See canoekayak.co.uk for advice. Wild swimming One of the 50 things your children should do before they’re 12, according to the National Trust (wildswimming.co.uk; hungouttodry.co.uk). during my travels. We took Ludo on his first trip to Africa when he was just three years old, and it remains one of the most magical shared experiences. We travelled to Mozambique. To see Ludo splashing in the Indian Ocean and digging on a deserted beach with local children while white-tipped sharks swam past and mighty whales leapt in the distance will remain in my mind for many years, even if he doesn’t remember. Ludo became obsessed with crabs and shells. There was none of the whingeing or fighting over toys so common back at home. This was a rich, organic, natural playground. I realise how lucky we were to have that African experience, but you don’t need to travel to the ends of the Earth to give your children those opportunities. Even in a big city like London, where we live, there are wild encounters to be had. I’m sure Ludo’s affinity with animals was partly a result of his early encounter with Ricky the rockhopper penguin at London Zoo. Children and animals seem to have a shared bond. Ludo stared long and hard at Ricky, who remained motionless. There was a connection. Ludo and Iona are fortunate to have a godmother – Kate Humble – who owns a farm. That farm also happens to be open to the public, offering courses and retreats for families wishing to share farm life with their children (humblebynature.com). These farm experiences offer a fantastic way to broach that disconnect between young people and our produce. Ludo and Iona have still not forgotten their visit during lambing. The children bottlefed, carried and cooed. It was such a simple experience but one that has unquestionably left a lasting legacy. He now wants to be a farmer. Where once children’s entertainment revolved around funfairs and theme parks, there has been a revolution in the opportunities for families. Where once a visit to the Natural History Museum would involve the slightly morbid sight of dead butterflies in cases, there is now a magnificent butterfly house where you can marvel at the colourful spectacle of these beautiful insects. The butterfly landing on Ludo’s nose has become the stuff of legend in our house. Miss Alice has already seen the photo. Ludo and Iona are still young, but it won’t be long before we can move up a level and take advantage of the multitude of activities and experiences offered across Britain, from the Via Ferrata in the Lake District, to Go Ape zip-wires spread across our woods and forests, kayaking, coasteering, wild swimming. Britain is a wild, natural playground for families with imagination. By using it and shaping our children’s attitude towards nature and the environment, we are helping to save it for their generation and beyond. Go on, go wild with the kids, it’ll be worth it. For more family activities,