New-look Caterham? It’s a stick-up

Chris Knapman takes a spin in a rebadged Caterham and finds it remarkably well put together

There’s a whiff of PR consultants earning their keep about the timing of Caterham’s latest model refresh. The idea that with spring upon us and fresh rivals coming out of the fibreglass left, right and centre, not to mention Caterham’s departure from Formula One, it needed to get itself some column inches, and fast. Thing is, designing and building an all-new car takes time and money, so, instead, why not just rename the ones you’ve already got? Because then all you need are stickers. So it is that, from now on, the old Roadsport, Supersport and Superlight transfers have been put on hold, replaced by a five-model range that starts with a novice friendly 160S and ends with the supercharged 620R, a car of such unhinged performance that you need to ask very serious questions of yourself before each and every drive. Occupying the middle ground are three core sets of stickers: 270, 360 and 420, the numbers referring to the power-to-weight ratios of the car on to which they are affixed. To these you can add either an S, signifying a package of upgrades aimed at those who will use the car on the road, or an R, for Caterham owners who will unleash their cars on track. I tried a 270, which uses a 135bhp, 1.6-litre Ford petrol engine and costs at its most If you’ve ever wondered what somebody sounds like reviewing a Ferrari moments before they are bedridden for a month with flu, Rebecca Jackson reveals all. Watch at: tgr.ph/1zpfGOf basic £19,995. Add another £3,000 for the factory to build it, the £3,995 R Pack, plus a few further extras to make it vaguely habitable on the road (like a heater), and the price quickly inflates by more than a third, which sounds a lot, and indeed is. Still, if a Seven 270R isn’t exactly cheap, it is tremendous fun. In an ideal world my test would have involved a trip to a racetrack, where I could really explore the extra balance afforded by the R Pack’s tweaked suspension and limited-slip differential. But I had more pressing business, namely buying a table and chairs. So, as unlikely as it sounds, I pointed the Seven’s nose south-west and drove all the way from Caterham’s shiny new HQ in Crawley to a Swedish furniture shop in Southampton. As with any outing in a Caterham (or indeed any trip to Ikea), the journey was more enjoyable than the destination, providing as it did a chance to revel in the delicate steering, the crispest throttle response and the most playful chassis you will find in any car at any price. Sure, I got grit in my eyes and after two hours in the composite race seat my back felt as though it’d been subjected to the kind of punishment last seen in Fifty Shades of Grey, but there can be no more exhilarating a way to endure such misery. More remarkable still is that despite it having the look of something that comes in flat-packed form as opposed to a means of transporting it home, the Caterham was successful in its mission. You just need to employ some clever packing techniques (or ramming, to use the technical term), accept that you can no longer reach second gear and restrict your furniture choices to items designed for toddlers. All that’s left to do now is hope there’s a screw missing so that I can take it all back. Caterham Seven 270R Price as tested: £33,455 Power: 135bhp 0-62mph: 5.0sec Average mpg: 30mpg (est) Rating: