The village flower show
Tina and Jessica had the idea for the flower show to raise funds for St Mary’s Church. No, not the roof or the bells, both in sound order, but the pressing demands of the bishop for more of a contribution because St Mary’s is a vibrant church. Punishment for success. Not because of happy-clappy Alpha nonsense but because of a sound congregation who like the King James Bible and are resolutely against the sign of peace. “Imagine,” says Tina, “I went to a church in
the Isle of Wight and the woman beside me said ‘Pleased to meet you’ instead of ‘Peace be with you’. Perfectly ghastly.”
Jessica is agnostic but really loves flowers. And St Mary’s, the heartbeat of the village, is jollity central. They did a brillo widescreen broadcast of the Meghan/Harry wedding last year with yummy food and sparkly drinks – Well, how is that playing now? Little minx. One is much safer on the future of dahlias, out of which Mrs Clotworthy has made a landing craft, the theme of the Flower Festival being the 175th anniversary of D-Day. The village WI have slaved over a Spitfire in greenery and daisies. Lady Trenchard has sailed up to judge the Flower Decorated Hat competition, and will countenance nothing that has been done with garage flower roses. “Garden roses, dear, and I can tell by the smell.” The Glenn Miller tribute band from Upper Chipping is playing its heart out and seems in the mood.
Sir Giles Trenchard, who comes from Yorkshire and was in the 13th/18th Royal Hussars (his father, the Colonel, told his troops to “Bloody tidy up this beach” to take their mind off Dunkirk) is looking after the Chipping Saintly veterans (not so many now) – Tina is going to give them all flowers with which to go home. The Chipping Saintly rose exhibition is quite something, roses having been so marvellous this year in Woldshire. And the scent…!
Tina and Jessica say to each other that everyone has been fabulous, the sponsorship of the wine bar by Mark Bedford was splendid and St Mary’s will make £1,000. So little for so much effort. That is village life.
St Mary’s did a brillo broadcast of the royal wedding
There’ll Always Be an England by Victoria Mather and Sue Macartney-Snape (Constable, £12.99). Facebook/Instagram: @social_stereotypes