It’s hardly surprising that Jeremy Clarkson’s farm shop is not worth a visit For once, Christmas can’t come soon enough, weird baubles and all
Meanwhile, half an hour from Gloucester Services is the world’s worst farm shop, and it happens to be owned by a Mr Jeremy Clarkson. Last weekend, I stayed with ith a pal who suggested we visit – “there’s not t much there, usually potatoes with a sign that says ‘definitely not organic’, but they do have a coffee van”. On the day we visited there was no coffee van and I suspect the whole place – a shack in the middle of a field
not far from Burford – is designed for social media and his forthcoming Amazon series, I Bought the Farm. There’s a sign over a milk vending machine outside that says “cow juice”, and almost no nothing for sale inside apa apart from pots of honey co costing a tenner with Jeremy Jeremy’s face on them, labe labelled “bee juice”. Plu Plus a shelf of his own bo books. Perhaps I sh shouldn’t have been su surprised, for an another large sign outside the sha shack proclaims the farm shop’s name – Did Diddly Squat.
In normal times, the news that John Lewis has opened its Christmas shop in August would make me grumble. This year? I feel a warm glow at the idea of buying baubles shaped like a zebra and a seal balancing a ball on the end of its nose. ( Were there circus animals in Bethlehem? I’m not sure, but you can now buy these on the John Lewis website.) The thought of families bickering over Monopoly and the festive sound of someone screaming about someone else using all the hot water, the idea of all this normality after such a year, is rather wonderful. I look forward to the Christmas adverts and I can’t wait for the rows about who’s sleeping in which bedroom. Quality Street, anyone? I reckon we can crack them open early too.