IT MUST BE TRUE…

I read it in the tabloids

Two Essex women have started a petition calling on the Oxford English Dictionary to remove its rude and “stereotypical” definition of the term “Essex Girl”. The OED defines Essex Girl as “a type of young woman, supposedly to be found in... Essex, and variously characterised as unintelligent, promiscuous, and materialistic”; even worse, Collins adds that Essex Girls are “devoid of taste”. Already, 5,500 people have signed the petition, but the OED says that while its definitions may change, it never removes entries. The 2017 Vladimir Putin calendar is out – and this year’s may be the loveliest yet, with pictures of the Russian leader cuddling a kitten, relaxing in a tree after a hike, and solemnly lighting a holy candle. Each carefully curated picture is paired with a quote from Putin extolling certain virtues, such as kindness to animals. Priced at 95 cents, it is expected to sell out fast.

A man from Florida, wrongly arrested for possession of methamphetamine, is suing the city of Orlando because his police mugshot is now permanently on the internet, although he has committed no crime. Last year, Daniel Rushing was pulled over for speeding; the cops then searched his car, and found a “rock-like” substance in the footwell. In a roadside test, it came up positive for crystal meth. Rushing was hauled back to the police station, and spent ten hours in a cell before a further test identified the “rocks” as the flakes of sugar from a Krispy Kreme donut. He alleges he has been defamed.