IT MUST BE TRUE…

I read it in the tabloids

A government-run medical body in northern India has proposed bottling and selling cow urine “as a health-giving drink”. The Ayurveda College and Hospital in Pilibhit, Uttar Pradesh – which promotes traditional Hindu Ayurvedic medicine – wants to link up with state dairies in order to harvest urine on an industrial scale. Dr Prakash Chandra Saxena, its superintendent, said that the aim “is to make cow urine easily available to the common public” and added that 10-20ml daily would “act as a preventative against fever, cough and stomach-related ailments”. Tripadvisor has recently awarded a five-star certificate of excellence to Captain Beany’s Baked Bean Museum of Excellence in Port Talbot, south Wales. The museum, situated in a flat on a housing estate, contains a 500-piece collection of baked beanrelated memorabilia. It is run by Captain Beany himself, who changed his name by deed poll in 1991, shortly after he started obsessively collecting baked bean tins. In 2015, he had 60 baked beans tattooed on his bald head, raising £3,600 for charity.

An amateur rocket scientist who wants to prove that the Earth is flat fired himself 1,900ft into the air over the Mojave Desert in California this week. “Mad” Mike Hughes made the steampowered device in his garage and reached a speed of about 350mph before deploying his parachute and landing with a bump. Hughes, a limousine driver, hopes in time to build a rocket that will take him 68 miles up, so that he can see for himself whether the Earth is, as he believes, shaped like a Frisbee.