Pick of the week’s Gossip

Whenever David Haig appears in a play, a large crowd waits to catch a glimpse of him at the stage door. But they’re not admirers of his theatre work, nor fans of Four Weddings and a Funeral (in which he played the hypersexed Bernard). “It happens in everything I do [and] it’s always the same people,” he told The Times. “And it’s all because I played a character called Pangol in Doctor Who in 1980.”

Sandra Bullock has revealed the secret of her still-youthful complexion. The 53-year-old actress has been having stem cells taken from the discarded foreskins of circumcised babies in South Korea pumped into her skin through microneedles. Bullock is convinced it works. “I think when you see how good it is for your face, you will run to your local facialist and say, ‘Give me the penis!’,” she said last week. But on social media, not everyone was amused. “Can you imagine if she said she used the clitoral hood of baby girls,” asked Youtube star Riyadh Khalaf. “Would it get the same lol-tastic response?”

They were not invited to the wedding, but when the new Duchess of Sussex’s estranged nephews (the sons of her half-brother) flew into London last week, they almost ended up as guests in one of Her Majesty’s prisons. Tyler Dooley, 25, handed in a knife when entering a London nightclub, and he and his brother, TJ, 26, were later warned by police. They apparently came armed after hearing Donald Trump’s warning that London was like a “war zone”.