IT MUST BE TRUE…

I read it in the tabloids

A North Yorkshire fish and chip shop has translated its menu to Mandarin to cope with the coachloads of Chinese tourists visiting it every week. Staff at Scotts Fish and Chips on the A64 near York say they serve more than 100 Chinese tourists a week, and that they have seen a huge increase in bookings by Chinese tour guides offering the “fish and chip experience” over the past two years. The shop’s owner, Tony Webster, suspects the trend was sparked by China’s President Xi sharing a fish and chip meal with David Cameron on a visit to the UK in 2015.

Antisocial passengers on crowded trains go to great lengths to keep the train seat next to them free; now an American company has come up with a product to make their lives easier – the “Seat Saver”. Head to displayfakefoods.com and you can buy a fake spillage made entirely of plastic – anything from an oozing ice-cream tub or overturned coffee cup to a dribbling ketchup sachet or sloppy slice of pizza. Seat Savers cost between $4.50 and $45, and, as the company notes, make “great gifts”.

Relations between Donald Trump and Angela Merkel have never been easy, and in Berlin the US president can now be seen hitting the German chancellor in the face. That’s the sight that greets visitors to the city’s Madame Tussauds, where an actor in a very lifelike silicone Trump mask whacks a punchball with Merkel’s picture on it as he dances to Abba’s Money, Money, Money. Made in London, the mask has real hair and took nine people two months to make.