WE’VE BOUGHT A 306 RALLYE SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO

Report 10: how to get the best from the 306

The other day, the 306 chalked up its thousandth mile since it got the kiss of life. It’s not much really. It’s probably done more miles on the back of a trailer over the course of the last seven months. And it’s certainly not much in the grand scheme of a car that had languished for several years with the odo reading 88,721. Nor when compared to the Bentley Conti GT it currently shares driveway space with – that’s piling on about 1,000 miles a week at the moment.

The temptation is to sneer at people who have a second or third car that doesn’t do many miles. But at current rate, the 306 is set to do about 1,600 miles this year, which is nothing, yet I feel I’ve used it quite a lot. But not on short hops, because I want it to be able to warm through. And not on long hauls, because I want to be sure I get there. Not that the Rallye has ever given me the least reason to doubt its reliability.

OK, if it sits for more than a week, it takes an extra turn on the starter before it catches, and in that heartbeat gap, a niggle of doubt rears up. And I’ve seen what it looks like in the engine bay and underneath. It may have been given a cleanish bill of health, but it looks as if parts could buckle if I got bold with a speed bump.

Mid-length trips are the way forward. The office is 60 miles from home... but the traffic into London. Weekend excursions? The family doesn’t want to know…

So the 306 gets used for ‘excuse’ driving. And there’s not nearly enough of those. The long way to collect kids. A solo shopping expedition. A few weeks ago, I loaded my paddleboard into it and drove to a river 20 miles away. It was an excuse to use the car more than the board.

Mileage is memorable in the 306. Probably because I have to find plausible excuses so it doesn’t sound like I’m trying to duck out of whatever jobs I’m meant to be doing at home. But also because there are no distractions. Take the centre console. The stereo doesn’t work. Three simple dials control all air settings. Below that, you can choose to have the rear demister or hazard lights on or off. The former is better described as on-ish. Ah, forgot about the air-conditioning light. That can be on or off. So too the cap atop the gearlever. That’s not a design feature.

I get back in the Bentley after this, or into anything new, and am utterly flummoxed for a few minutes. So many buttons. So many options. So much going on. In many ways I find the 306 more relaxing. I just drive it – I don’t pine for what I haven’t got.

Why am I telling you all this? Because in the four weeks since the last report, I’ve failed to get the car to a garage that can do the fine wheel balance that might cure the 70mph wheel wobble.