S&M Tips to make the most of your Bondage Kit with Fifty Shades stars Jamie Dor­nan & Dakota John­son

VIZ - - Trump Comics Presents -

Many peo­ple may be quite daunted by the prospect of in­dulging in BDSM love­play. But they need not worry, and whilst their are no rules as to what you can and can’t do, Dakota and Jamie have se­lected a few hints and tips to help you along.

Jamie: “Be­ing re­strained can be a great turn on for both of you. Fel­las, try fas­ten­ing your mis­sus to the bed us­ing the pa­per shack­les, then drive her wild by tick­ling her on the wot not us­ing the pa­per feather. When you’ve fin­ished, sim­ply swap over.”

Dakota: “Men like a strong, dom­i­nat­ing woman. So pre­tend to be a school­teacher by ty­ing your hair up in a bun and putting on a pair of glasses. Then tell your fella to bend over and smack him on the arse with the pa­per pad­dle un­til he cli­maxes.”

Jamie: “Pre­tend to be some­one else to spice up a pa­per bondage ses­sion. Your role play fan­tasy is only lim­ited by your erotic imag­i­na­tion. Be a swash­buck­ling pi­rate hav­ing his way with a raven-haired duchess who he’s cap­tured off a Span­ish galleon. Or why not be a randy sul­tan whose eye has been caught by a vestal vir­gin in his harem? Or you could be a scrapdealer and your part­ner’s a woman who’s come in with some clearly stolen cop­per ca­ble, and you’ve threat­ened to go to the po­lice un­less she makes it worth your while with an S&M ses­sion be­hind a skip of non-fer­rous metal.”

Dakota: “Re­mem­ber to agree a safe word with your part­ner in case it all gets too much and ei­ther of you feels un­com­fort­able with the di­rec­tion your sub/dom ses­sion is tak­ing. And to make sure it isn’t in­ter­preted as part of the game, it needs to be a phrase you would never nor­mally hear, such as ‘Spring comes early in Ber­lin’, ‘ The red fox trots qui­etly at mid­night’ or ‘That Michael Mac­in­tyre is funny, isn’t he?’.

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