INTERVIEW Stripping back the dating game
I WAS away last week but floor of Smithfield meat that’s not why I failed to market at the end of a busy seize upon the chance to day. Honestly, I’ll never review Channel 4’s Naked be able to look at a set of Attraction. giblets in the same way
No, the main reason I again. decided to wait until the You’d think I’d be sophomore instalment immune to this sort of was to make sure I hadn’t thing by now though, the hallucinated that entire first real example of full first episode. frontal male and female
A dating show in which nudity on UK TV having the contestants get to see been way back in 1986. their prospective beaus It was on a Dennis in the buff from the word Potter-ish crime thriller go, the best you could say called Dead Head which, about it is that it certainly unsurprisingly after all the doesn’t waste any time moral furore it caused, has beating about the bush. never been repeated since.
That wasn’t innuendo, by Nevertheless, it’ll be the way – the problem with forever etched on my discussing programmes retinas thanks to several like this is that everything genuine “drop the toast” you write comes across as moments – not least the filthy. sight of the actress Tacy
So, while other, more Kneale naked save for a traditional dating shows pair of wellies. like Blind Date and Don’t forget, I was only Take Me Out indulge in 14 at the time – there was groansome, nudge-wink no internet back then and come-ons – “Are you pornography existed a parking ticket? almost exclusively ‘Cos you’ve got in the form of ‘fine’ written dog-eared all over you” magazines etc – as their discarded USP, Naked in bramble Attraction just bushes. brazenly drops Indeed, up its trousers until that point and does the in my sheltered Macarena. adolescent life
Rude bits I’d assumed that – upstairs AND all naked ladies downstairs, Naked Attraction came with
host Anna Richardson male and staples down female – are paraded for all the middle of them. the world to see, while the These days though there person doing the picking are jiggling appendages dismisses any hopefuls everywhere you look, from he or she doesn’t like the War and Peace to Game look of. of Thrones (or Bums and
It’s as shallow as a Dragons as it’s called teaspoon and lacking any around mine). sort of sociological merit, Lord knows what the but, annoyingly, it’s fairly kids of today will expect bomb-proof ratings-wise. from that first boyfriend/
It’s the televisual girlfriend when they equivalent of spotting a eventually come of age. pretty girl on the Tube with My advice to them on the her dress inadvertently best way to pick a partner? tucked in her undies or a Ask them if they think fit fella with his flies wide Naked Attraction is a good and the front of his boxers show and, if they say yes, agape. run like hell.
Once seen, it’s the feeling of simultaneously being unable to look away – all the while being too scared to point out the wardrobe malfunction in case everyone else thinks you’re a perv for staring in the first place.
As a result you’re left with a show that kind of hangs there in the late schedules like the last turkey in the butcher’s shop window and is about as alluring as the trading
SPOOKY drama The Living and the Dead (BBC1) ended last week with a final seancethemed twist that set things up for a possible second series.
So plodding was it though and riddled with improbabilities – how the hell did that modernday car end up in a 19th-century ditch? – that there’s not a ghost of a chance I’ll be tuning in.