Wales On Sunday

LOVE WITH ‘STUNNING’ WOMAN

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comes to a crossroads at some point in life and you have to make the decision to either turn left or right.

“All I’m saying is, have a good think before you commit to either choice because it could be the last thing you do.”

What’s been moment? “Ha, getting caught I suppose. “To be honest though, I don’t look at it in terms of good/bad times... it’s just life.

“You’ve just got to rock on and get through it, and if something comes along that knocks you on your ar*e, just pick yourself back up again.”

What’s memory?

“Blimey, ain’t got a Scooby-Doo, sorry. That’s a weird old question... earliest memory? “Yesterday’s breakfast perhaps?” After a string of high-profile failed romances do you think you’ll ever find true love?

“I already have – she’s 63 years old and absolutely stunning.

“It’s like I always say, stick to what you know, and my Joan comes from the same era and likes all the same things as me.

“We’re traditiona­l and have the same style and attitudes to things.

“There’s not a 33-year-old bird out there who’s fit to clean her shoes, to be honest.

“So she’s an OAP, but so am I – we can be two old people together and I f***ing love it.

“Will we get married? Yes, but not until I’m out of here.”

Do you still keep in touch with Tom Hardy? (the actor having famously played Charlie in an your you’re worst earliest award-winning 2008 film)

“Tom’s a nice fella but he distances himself from me now – gone on to bigger, better things, I suppose.

“I used to get cards and messages from him, but I get f*** all now.

“Oh well, I guess that’s the way it is and I wish him well. No one else could have played me better, that’s for sure.”

Finally, how do you feel about Brexit?

“I don’t know a lot about it, so I can’t comment on it. But, as for that f***ing idiot Boris Johnson being the UK’s next Prime Minister? Mate, the country’s a circus these days.

“Anyway, got to go, big day today – me and my pal Les are meeting at three o’clock for a game of Scrabble.

“I’m taking my dictionary and a pen and paper. I’m gonna smash him with words he’s never seen before. Put your money on me, son. Love ya, bye.”

To find out more about the campaign, search Trash Knives, Not Lives on Facebook.

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