Him Tarzan, you bored
For the first time since Disney’s animated adventure in 1999, the lord of the jungle swings back into cinemas.
Edgar Rice Burroughs’ creation doesn’t have the best history on the big screen – Greystoke: The Legend of Tarzan starring Christopher Lambert anyone? – so you would’ve thought there would be plenty of scope for a rip-roaring reboot.
After his impressive work on the final four (for now) Harry Potter movies, Englishman David Yates also seemed like an ideal choice to helm lead star Alexander Skarsgård’s loincloth-clad escapades.
Unfortunately, though, all of that promise is squandered with a remarkably dull take on the vine-swinger missing all of the classic derringdo ingredients synonymous with the character.
Craig Brewer (Black Snake Moan) and Adam Cozad’s ( Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit) story initially takes Skarsgård’s hero out of the jungle to London, where he is living happily with wife Jane (Margot Robbie).
But the pair are soon called back to their former home in Africa to investigate the suspicious activities at a mining encampment.
Forsaking the initial attraction and developing relationship between Tarzan and Jane is the film’s first mistake – there’s no charming meet-cutes or sizzling chemistry on show between Skarsgård and Robbie.
The second, more crucial, error is its choice of leading man. Skarsgård may look great with his shirt off, and possess the long hair and rippling abs befitting Tarzan, but he’s sorely lacking in the charisma department.
Robbie – who, unlike her fellow former TV star Skarsgård has proved her worth on the big screen – fares even worse as she’s saddled with a thankless damsel-in-distress role that’s a world away from the modern action heroine.
The cast in general struggle, with Samuel L. Jackson’s American hunter George Washington Williams a poor relation to his more iconic roles and his ex-Django Unchained co-star Christoph Waltz a bit of an embarrassment as limp bad guy Leon Rom.
All of this would have been forgivable if Yates and his special effects team delivered some sensational set pieces – but they are very much of the hit-and-miss variety.
While falling short of the excellent standards set in this year’s Jungle Book, there are some memorable animals on show as Yates resurrects his Potter swooping, swirling camerawork to film spectacular ostrich stampedes and angry apes on the rampage, as well as exciting slave train and river steamer chase scenes.
However, some of the CGI borders on the offensive as even Tarzan swinging on vines looks farcically fake – seriously, how hard could that have been to get right!?
Starting slow and only rarely soaring to the treetops, The Legend of Tarzan sadly continues the literary icon’s big screen curse, and is unlikely to win him any new followers.