Will I be able to cope with the old normal?
WILL we know what to do when Monday comes? Never mind the new normal – I’ve started to forget what the old normal was.
I am no longer the blonde, straight-haired, office-blouse-wearing thirty-something in the picture above this column.
I haven’t had a hair cut since 2019. And if I once tried to hide the grey hairs that have been gathering a small army across my parting, I lost that battle a long time ago.
I’ve barely straightened my hair since March last year – let alone dyed it. Like many women I know, the pandemic has forced me to embrace the grey and the frizz.
I do find myself frequently peering in slight horror at my laptop at my forty-something wrinkles and mop as I idly await others to join the next Zoom call.
But I do nothing about it.
While there are reports of hairdressers and beauticians being booked up for the next three months by people desperate to get a chop, a wax or a trim, I won’t be joining the queue.
What would I even make idle chit chat about to a hairdresser after six months of us both being locked up inside?
I think I’ve become worrying unstylable and antisocial in lockdown.
I love the high street. I’ve always been keen to support independent retailers. But after months of living without my local shops, I’ve found they’ve become somewhat, well, non-essential.
Remember when shopping was a day trip? I can’t imagine now heading to a shopping centre to join crowds of people queuing at the tills or outside the doors.
Anything more than just nipping to the shops for an occasional piece of clothing or a present seems like a waste of a day.
I’m pretty sure I’ve become a skinflint in lockdown.
I’m sort of dreading the reopening of family attractions. Don’t get me wrong, the occasional trip to the zoo or an annual day out at a theme park is something I really look forward to.
But I’ve loved spending the weekends just pootling to the beach or taking a stroll across the moors or staying local and discovering new tracks – and outdoor swimming spots – on our doorstep.
I do not wish to spend weekends in a grubby soft play or indoor trampoline park, the local leisure pool or bowling alley. And as much as I love the cinema, I don’t feel the same way about sitting watching a film with strangers – in masks – that I used to.
I’m worried I’ve become boring in lockdown.
What about travel? On Reopening Day we’ll be driving 300 miles to Kent to stay in an Airbnb to safely visit family that we’ve not seen for nearly nine months.
Don’t get me wrong, I can’t wait to see family and friends – though I wish I could give them a long overdue hug.
But I’m not looking forward to the five-hour car journey. We’ve barely used the car in the last six months. Long distance travel seems like a thing of the past.
I used to love going away and travelling around the country and abroad, exploring new places, seeing people.
Is it possible I’ve become a stay-athome person in lockdown?
I’ve been looking forward to pubs and restaurants reopening for a long time. The chance to socialise with friends and have a meal cooked by someone else in a place other than my own living room is something that fills me with joy.
But I can barely remember how to go out. Will I need to brush my hair? Buy some new clothes? Get in the car?
It terrifies me to admit that I might just stay at home.