American accents the least of our worries
I WAS somewhat bemused by an article bemoaning the fact that children are growing up with American accents. I cannot understand the concern. The war against the “cultural”, verbal and grammatical invasion from America is a war long lost. Accent is just a final skirmish.
We no longer catch trains at the railway stations, but instead we are constantly informed that trains are caught at “train stations”. Television programmes are no longer broadcast in series, but are beamed to us in “seasons”. To attract our attention, we are enjoined to “listen up”. Who thought that the act of listening had direction? We no longer go to the pictures to see a film, we go to the “movies” to watch a “movie”.
I no longer receive post from the postman, nor do I post my letters in a pillar box. I am now forced to receive “mail” from a “mailman”, which I presume is posted, or possibly “mailed”, in a “mail box”.
Shops and services are no longer available all day, every day, but instead they are provided “24-7”.
Infinitives are split more frequently than firewood, thanks to Captain Kirk. We are no longer obliged to perform our duty, but we are “obligated”. We neither have lunch nor eat lunch. We “do” lunch.
The word “can” is used where the correct word is “may”, as in “can I go out?” When I hear such a request, I mentally suppress the response: “I’m sure it is within your ability to go out, but whether you may or may not go out is another question.”
And when people are asked how they are, a question which demands an adverb answer; the new response is the adjective “good”, which sounds like a self-congratulatory expression of hubris to me.
And then there’s the annoying non-verbal, cultural aspects. People are far more predisposed to hugging, when a firm handshake will do these days.
Public outpourings of emotion for the death of celebrities and public figures is taking over the country in a mass hysteria more prevalent than decaying flowers at an accident black-spot.
The humble tie, jacket and polished shoe have given way to the avalanche of T-shirt, hooded top and plimsoll, or should I say “sneaker”? And should I really feel distressed when I witness one vapid celebrity slap another vapid celebrity at a nauseating awards ceremony?
Pronunciation has always been a casualty of American television. Progress the verb and progress the noun are pronounced the same these days. There’s hardly a man alive under 50 who can say harassment or controversy properly. Finance and privacy have both acquired a long American “i”. Affected has been usurped by the word “impacted”. We are no longer affected by something, we are “impacted” by it.
The art of ordering a drink in the pub, or possibly “a beer in a bar”, has been rendered impolite. Many times I hear customers ask the barman
(or is that “bar tender”?) “can I get a beer?”, to which the correct response is: “No, sir. You may have a pint, but I will serve it for you, after you have said ‘please’”.
And finally, we have aped the
USA by electing a mendacious, adulterous, nepotistic, dishonest, egotistical, self-serving, law breaking, tax-and-welfare averse buffoon with ridiculous hair to lead our government. I think children growing up with American accents is the least of our worries.
Vincent Baughan
Bath