Chris was a strong swimmer but rivers can hold hidden dangers
National Lottery Special Achievement Award winner Debbie Turnbull, 58, tells Anna Moore how her son’s tragic death drove her passion to educate young people about river dangers
one mother’s moving story
woman & home are proud to support The National Lottery Awards, the annual search for the UK’s favourite Lottery-funded good causes. This year’s Special Achievement winner, Debbie, who was presented with her award in a special BBC One show, has turned the tragic death of her young son into a force for good, by setting up River and Sea Sense. Debbie lives in Holywell, Wales with her husband, John. “Our son Chris was a water-baby, a dare devil, an adventurer. He first learned to swim when he was three years old on holiday in Tenerife. He jumped into the pool and though one of his armbands deflated straight away, he just decided to keep going. I was so proud of him – and that was the beginning of his love of water.
As a family, we always had an interest in the outdoors. We’d go out on boats, which Chris loved. He became a strong swimmer, an experienced canoeist and a talented rugby player. We owned a pub for five years and used to get a lot of cadets passing through – and Chris would be out there with them. He learned so much at a very young age. Nothing fazed him. As our only child, we were very, very close. Chris had a big group of friends and I ran an open house. I helped them out, took them everywhere in the car. Chris’s friends nicknamed him “Debs” after me as I was always in the background!
That summer of 2006 had been boiling hot and on Monday 14 August, Chris, who was 15, and his friends arranged to go swimming in the
Llugwy River, a train and bus ride away. Pont Cyfyng Falls – the spot they were heading to – had been like a mill pond most of the summer and they’d been before and had a wonderful time. It’s idyllic – I still think it’s beautiful – but there’d been heavy rain at the weekend, which had created a deep icy whirlpool with water from the top of the mountains. In conditions like that, it’s the most dangerous place you can go.
We didn’t know that then and I wasn’t worried in the slightest when I dropped Chris at the station. He was doing what boys do.
His last words to me when he got out the car were, “Love you Mum!” then he hurried off to meet his friends. >>
As our only child, we were very, very close
At the time, I ran a weight loss business so I came home and spent the whole day on the phone, without stopping for a break or watching the news. At 4.10, John came home from work and I knew instantly something was wrong. He’d just heard on the car radio that a boy was missing at Pont Cyfyng Falls. Somehow, straightaway, we both knew it was Chris. We just had this terrible gut feeling.
As I picked up the phone to call the police, the doorbell rang. It was two police officers who told us that a boy had gone missing and they thought it was our son. They couldn’t give any more information – they didn’t even tell us that it had happened in the water. We just had to sit and wait until divers found Chris’s body at around 6.30 that evening.
We later learned from Chris’s friends that he’d been sitting on the edge of a ledge, putting his thumbs up to his mates then slipped into the water.
He’d been sucked into the whirlpool made by the freezing mountain water, and the shock had disabled him, giving him a massive heart attack.
John and I were both in shock when we were taken to the hospital in Bangor to identify our son’s body. Less than 12 hours ago, I’d dropped Chris off at the station. It was too much to take in.
Chris looked beautiful, like he was fast asleep – but his lips were blue. I asked if they could put a blanket on him in case he was cold and the woman said gently, “of course we will.” He was still wearing his chain around his neck – the three Welsh feathers – which I took and now wear always. I also took a lock of his hair.
It was very, very hard. The feeling of hopelessness and helplessness. I was put on a ridiculous amount of medication, which made me worse, and I did attempt my own life on two occasions. I’m not proud of it but I tell people because I’ve come a long way since then and that’s what’s important.
There were over 300 people at Chris’s funeral and John and I both wrote poems and managed to read them. Two weeks later, Chris’s school rang and asked if I could go in and speak to the boys, as there was a lot of emotion and hysteria about what had happened. I went in, there was a big assembly and I stood at the front and told the boys about drowning, about cold water shock, and water safety, and I also promised I was going to do something about it. After that, more schools began getting in touch.
My passion to educate children about the dangers of water grew from there. I’d appeared in the local press and radio so if there was an incident, they’d always call me. Then I went on ITV, the BBC. Someone told me I should apply for some funding through UnLtd, a funding body for social entrepreneurs. They came over to meet me and gave me a grant for £5,000, which I spent on a computer, a phone, leaflets. I received over £14,800 from the National Lottery, which has helped me buy valuable education equipment to educate young people in schools and youth groups about drowning prevention. In 2008, riverandseasense.com became a non-profit organisation and I’m now about to go for charity status. I go into schools, organise water safety and life-saving courses and have devised a mapping system for drowning prevention, which tracks danger spots, fatalities and near miss incidents.
I’ve spoken to 200,000 children now. I talk about Chris, what happened and why. I tell them about peer pressure and open water safety, and things as basic as making sure your phone is charged and your parents know where you are.
I don’t know how I’d be or who’d
I’d be if I didn’t do this. It’s helped me build resilience. John has supported me but we all grieve in different ways. I’ve also been contacted by parents who’ve lost children to drowning and try to do what I can to support them. One mother, Maxine Johnson, lost her son the same summer that I lost Chris. He drowned in a reservoir in South Wales. Finding each other helped both of us as no one else gets it, no one else can really understand. She has become an ambassador for Welsh Water.
There’s still so much I want to do. Lottery funding has helped me put on more events and I want to introduce CPR training in schools. The money has been a great enabler. I’d love a celebrity ambassador and I’m looking for sponsorship.
When I first lost Chris, it was hard to remember him in any way other than how he was in the mortuary – even now there are a lot of blanks. But memories are coming back. I remember him offering to clean the car when he was a little boy, and getting the hosepipe out with his mates. Later he called, “Mum, I’ve done a really good job, come and see!” I stepped out and he soaked me head to toe – but fair play, he’d cleaned the car too! I say he’s living in his castle in the sky and I know he’s my driver. He’s with me all the time. Well, most of the time – unless he’s popping off to have some fun!” w&h Visit riverandseasense.com or
facebook.com/riverandseassense
We just had this terrible gut feeling