Learn how to relax and let the worries of the day fade away

ONE COULD say that the past week or so has been very eventful with election fever across the pond, national lockdown here and now the hope of a new vaccine. In a short space of time our world has changed again.

In my own world things have been less eventful, in that over the past week I’ve mainly been stuck in bed with a virus ( not that one). Things that I had planned to do quickly went out of the window as my own health took priority. Work, gardening and studying were quickly replaced with sleep, rest and more sleep. Once again I was in awe of how my body took over and with little to no conscious thought from me, it fought and repaired, knowing exactly what to do.

However, there was one question that a number of those around me raised which stuck in my mind, ‘ aren’t you worried?’

Years ago, this type of curve ball would have worried me, I would have been very worried that I had ‘ the’ virus, I would have been worried about the impact that would have on me, my family, I would have run worst case scenarios in my head and worked out plans for each of them. I would have worried about my clients, the work I hadn’t done, the study that I had to do that I was now behind on, worried how I would have caught up, worried about household chores that were outstanding, how my husband was carrying the load. I would have worried about things that were totally irrelevant but because I was worrying I’d put them in the mix too, my mind spiralling in circles that only got bigger and more complex!

Even now when I think about it, it feels exhausting, and not a great place to be in when you’re supposed to be resting.

It is of course normal to worry a little, a worry thought can pop into our mind and before we know it we are time travelling days maybe even weeks into a future that hasn’t happened yet. But at some point we always notice what we are doing, and this, in my mind, is the invisible key that unlocks more peace of mind than we know.

The way that I now see worry is that it is simply made up of two parts. The initial worry thought and then the worry thinking we do as a result of that initial thought. None of us can control what thought pops in to our mind initially, but what is more important is what happens after that.

Even if we get sucked into a rabbit hole of worry, at some point we notice what we are doing, and as soon as we’ve noticed it, like it or not, we are back more in the present. It’s like the act of noticing loosens the grip of the worry thinking, leaving us with a choice – we can continue to do more or we can simply let it go.

At times like this I often think of the famous quote by Mary Schmich ‘ Worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum’. We know this, deep down, we know that none of us know what the future holds, our world can change in a matter of moments, but knowing that doesn’t stop a piece of gum being handed to us – but knowing that we don’t have to chew it and blow bubbles can make all the difference.