I FEAR FOR OUR LOVE LIFE

I am 55 and worried that I will never be able to have sex again. Two years ago, I noticed that my penis had begun to bend. My GP diagnosed Peyronie’s disease. He recommended vitamin E supplements and using a vacuum pump to help with erections, but neither has worked. Now I can no longer make love to my wife. I feel that I am losing my manhood. My wife understands, but says she wouldn’t like to think we’d never make love again. What can I do next? Peyronie’s disease, which is a build-up of plaque under the skin of the penis, is a very distressing condition. It impacts heavily on intimacy and lovemaking and, understandably, can adversely affect a man’s self-esteem, mood and feelings of masculinity. Research shows that varying degrees of Peyronie’s disease can affect around one in 20 men in the UK and, sadly, around 45 per cent feel their doctor has not been helpful. If you are in a loving relationship, it is devastating not to be able to enjoy the pleasure, excitement and closeness that making love brings. Return to your GP and ask for a referral to a urologist. There are many treatments available, from oral drugs to injections – even surgery. You have a loving wife, so talk to her and tell her how much you love her and miss the sexual relationship you shared. Explain to her what treatments are available and that you are going to get the help you need. In the meantime, continue to touch, kiss and caress as it’s important to feel close to each other and know that you will hopefully be able to make love again. For more information, visit the British Dupuytren’s Society (dupuytrens-society.org.uk) or contact the Sexual Advice Association (020 7486 7262).