I WANT DAD TO BE AT MY WEDDING

My father left my mother for another woman two years ago. He now lives in Italy, though they are no longer together. My mother was absolutely devastated and has hardly spoken to him since. They are divorcing. I am getting married next year. My mother and her family do not want my dad to come to the wedding. I have always been close to my father, though I was deeply upset by how much he hurt my mother. I am still in touch with him though this makes me feel guilty because I know it upsets my mother. I would like him to come to my wedding but I don’t know what I should do. I do understand how deeply your mother has been hurt, but don’t feel guilty about being close to your father. If parents divorce, it is important that they try to work at having a civilised relationship with each other for the sake of the children and in the end it is better for them too. It sounds as though your mother is still devastated and ideally she should seek counselling to help her come to terms with the loss of her marriage. In the meantime, it would be sad if your father couldn’t attend your wedding. Explain to your mother that, though you know how painful it is for her, you very much want both your parents to be there. Ask your mother and father if they could talk beforehand and start to rebuild their relationship not as a couple but as divorced parents, then maybe your mother would be more understanding and find it easier. I hope they can put aside their differences on your special day.