The age of cheap popcorn

Let’s agree right off the bat that the worst things about the coronavirus pandemic — by a wide margin — is the horrible and escalating loss of life from COVID-19; the lingering damage to the health of many of those who survive it; the strain placed on the national psyche by rollercoaster outbreaks and lockdowns; and the economic devastation wrought by the public health emergency.

But at least for the next 800 words or so, let’s devote ourselves to a decidedly non-mortal but nonetheless culturally significant aspect of that economic impact: the potential end of moviegoing as we know it.

On Thursday, Warner Bros. announced that all of its major productions for 2021 would be released simultaneously in U.S. movie theaters and on the HBO Max streaming service, which like the studio is a subsidiary of the communications giant

AT&T. The Warner slate includes pandemic-delayed fare such as Denis Villeneuve’s eagerly awaited — by aging sci-fi nerds like me, at least — adaptation of Frank Herbert’s novel “Dune” as well as “The Matrix 4,” a “Space Jam” reboot starring Lebron James, and “Godzilla vs. Kong,” which, based on the title, I assume is a legal drama.

Studio chairman Toby Emmerich told the Hollywood Reporter that Warner’s move would actually be good for theaters . “We think where theaters are open, and consumers can go, that a lot of people will choose to go to the theater, especially for big movies,” he said.

Mmm yeah. The test case for this strategy is “Wonder Woman 1984,” which had been pushed back from its initial summer 2020 release date to a Christmas Day rollout in theaters and on HBO Max. That ostensible one-film experiment was announced a few weeks ago.

Considering the current course of coronavirus infections in New York, California and other important theatrical regions, it’s unlikely the superhero sequel will do boffo box-office in cineplexes, though I look forward to watching it from the comfort of my living room with a big bowl of home-cooked popcorn (unit cost: maybe a dime, 13 cents with salt and butter) resting on my softening midsection.

Another person who was not buying Emmerich’s assurances was Adam Aron, chief of the AMC chain, who released a statement noting that while he had previously gone along with the studio’s plan for “Wonder Woman 1984,” he wasn’t going to be played for a chump through 2021.

Aron accused AT&T of using Warner’s slate to boost HBO Max, its entry in the streamingvideo wars currently being waged among Netflix, Disney and other combatants. “We will

do all in our power to ensure that Warner does not do so at our expense,” the AMC boss warned. “We will aggressively pursue economic terms that preserve our business. We have already commenced an immediate and urgent dialogue with the leadership of Warner on this subject.”

I have seen only one movie in a theater since the pandemic began. It was Christopher Nolan’s time-travel espionage film “Tenet,” a Warner Bros. release that still hasn’t been released on either a streaming service or video on demand, or even the ancient format known to our pioneer ancestors as “DVD.” (That happens next week.)

“Tenet” was so mind-blowingly confusing — even by the Rubik’s-cube standards of Nolan’s earlier films like “Inception” and “Memento” — that my fears of catching COVID-19 from the four other people in the Sunday matinee show at Colonie Center were ousted from my brain by the second reel. But like the villainous Bane in Nolan’s “The Dark Knight Rises,” I never took my mask off and abjured popcorn, which is akin to going to my grandmother’s house and passing up a slice of lemon meringue pie.

Which brings us to the “economic terms” Aron referred to. The modern theatrical model gives studios a more significant chunk of ticket revenue, while exhibitors get to make their profits on concessions — “Movies for show, popcorn for dough” is an old maxim for theater owners.

Exhibitors have been grousing for years as what used to be a months-long gap between a theatrical opening and a video release has narrowed from several months to a handful of weeks. The rise of streaming services has supercharged this narrowing of the theatrical window — which is why many theater owners a year ago balked at showing Martin Scorsese’s “The Irishman” before it premiered on Netflix.

AMC and other chains will do a lot to get popcorn and Mountain Dew consumers into its theaters, but it’s going to want a bigger piece of the ticket price from studios who are more focused on netting streaming subscribers — who are in turn less likely to pony up $12 per ticket to watch a movie they can see at home for a lot less money. Did I mention the popcorn is cheaper?

And for those of us who love movies but also love movie going — the velvety darkness before the main feature, the pleasure of laughing or gasping along with other people sharing the same experience, even the anticipation that settles on us as we wait in line — that will be a bummer.

There is, of course, a significant difference between a bummer and a tragedy. But still.