We’ve got to pump the brakes on impatience
A recent Times Union article stated that experts blame the pandemic, with its reduced road traffic, for today’s rash of speeding drivers. This makes about as much sense as blaming retail theft on stores for having products available.
People choose the speed at which they drive. They decide whether or not to needlessly endanger themselves and others. When they’re enclosed in a vehicle, some lose a sense of responsibility toward others and even disregard the value of their own precious lives in a way that they wouldn’t do in other circumstances.
A few months ago, I was in a small parking lot walking the short distance from the nearest row of cars to the entrance of a store. A driver in his 20s or 30s, tearing though to avoid the traffic light on the corner, yelled obscenities at me for … what? For being there before he was? For existing? For not realizing that he was the center of the universe?
The three or four seconds it took me to finish walking across his vehicle’s path interfered with his all-important desires, never mind that I was there to shop at the business that provided the parking lot and he was not.
Was he happier as a result? The answer was obvious.
When did we forget that patience is the acceptance of reality, including the realities of space and time when we’re moving from one place to another? Why is travel time considered a waste to be avoided at all costs, rather than a fact of life? Despite all of the (supposedly) time-saving conveniences available to us, why are many of us more rushed, irritable, anxious and depressed than those who had slower, less convenient lives?
Accepting reality means not being offended or disappointed because not every day is sunny and not every person we encounter will please us. Scheduling down to the minute makes frustration inevitable. Things wear out and break. Not everything is available at all times. Other people do things that weren’t part of our plans. Waiting in line is to be expected, and when the line is short or there is none, what a pleasant surprise!
Life isn’t a video game in which the fastest player wins. Slowing down a bit, perhaps by doing a little less, is a choice that can lead us to think more clearly and make better decisions. Equally as important, it can also evoke more positive emotions, to the benefit of our own bodies and our relationships with others.
Accepting life as it is — that is, accepting limitations — gives rise to gratitude that we’re here at all, and that we have as much time as we do. Those who live this way are more than patient, they’re joyful. Spread the word.