THE LIGHTER SIDE

BEVERLY HILLS—God bless America, and how’s everybody?

The United Farm Workers blasted Monday’s deportation orders and warned of a spike in food prices. The lack of anger over the deportations indicates Americans don’t really want their vegetables. If migrant workers picked candy bars, we’d build a wall to keep them in and make M&M’s pay for it.

The Weather Channel reported spectacularly warm weather across the country’s mid-section and on the Eastern Seaboard last week. Trees and flowers are blooming way too soon. The pollen count is so high in Kentucky that the drug dealers are converting their crystal meth back into Sudafed.

The New York Post said New Yorkers mention their disdain for Trump at restaurant tables but in L.A. it’s all they talk about. Pat Buchanan just suggested they secede. You have to admit the Civil War started when Republicans elected an unpopular candidate and Democrats declared, “Not my president.”

The Center for Global Policy called for the U.S. to halt military and financial aid to Pakistan and rescind its status as non-NATO ally. Elements there subvert U.S. policy and finance Taliban rebels. Having Pakistan as an ally is like having a brotherin-law with a gambling problem and no car.