Albuquerque Journal

Teen seeks advice to approach crush

- Abigail Van Buren Contact www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

DEAR ABBY: I understand that a 15-year-old guy seeking relationsh­ip advice is shameful and that I’m probably better off not worrying about relationsh­ips in the first place, but I’m gonna try.

I’m in high school, and I’m searching for a relationsh­ip with a certain girl. I’ve known her for eight years, and I always had a little kid crush on her, but it’s evolved and we’ve gotten closer. We used to talk a lot. She was in a relationsh­ip then. Even though we had feelings for each other, she was loyal to him.

A couple months ago they broke up. As far as I know, she’s single, but we don’t really talk much anymore. A couple times I’ve started conversati­ons with her, but they are usually short-lived.

She knows I have feelings for her, but nothing has happened. She’s the one I want and now’s my opportunit­y, but I don’t want to ruin the chance. I’m afraid she won’t be single for long. — WANTS TO TRY IN OHIO

DEAR WANTS TO TRY: It is not “shameful” to ask for advice. Call her and ask how her summer has been. If you did anything interestin­g, tell her about it. Then ask her if she’s seeing anybody special. If she says no, ask if she’d like to go to a movie, a sporting event or on a hike with you — depending upon her interests. I can’t guarantee it will get you the response you’re hoping for, but at least you will know where you — and she — stand.

DEAR ABBY: My daughter will turn 6 soon, and she is a lovely, wonderful child. The only thing is, my parents and I have spoiled her a tad.

Holidays have always been celebrated with lots of gifts. I’m starting to worry that perhaps she’s becoming too materialis­tic. What’s the proper etiquette for requesting no gifts on her birthday invitation­s? — SPOILED IN WASHINGTON

DEAR SPOILED: I don’t think it’s necessary to state on the invitation “no gifts.” There are ways to teach children that there are other, less-fortunate children in this world.

One way would be to volunteer at an organizati­on that serves the underprivi­leged so your daughter can see for herself how lucky she is. Another would be to mention on the invitation that any gifts will be donated to a cause. If you are asked why, be honest and upfront about it.

DEAR ABBY: If you are traveling with a group of friends on a plane, is it rude for one couple to upgrade to first class? This was a group trip traveling to go on a cruise together.

— JUST WONDERING IN FLORIDA

DEAR JUST WONDERING: I wouldn’t call it a breach of etiquette. However, it’s less than an expression of solidarity with the friends who are sitting in the back. Personally, I think it sends a wrong message and could cause resentment unless there’s a practical reason the couple needs the extra space.

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