Albuquerque Journal

Long-distance lovers may be drifting apart

- Abigail Van Buren Contact www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

DEAR ABBY: I am a retired male. My girlfriend still works. We have been exclusive for three years. We live 300 miles apart, but see each other every two or three weeks for at least three days and, until now, have had a very good relationsh­ip.

The problem is, she’s saying she wants to socialize with her ex-husband, who lives in her town. They have been divorced for eight years, but she wants to see him occasional­ly in a “social setting,” not just when it pertains to their two adult children, who live out of state.

I understand that they need to have a relationsh­ip because of their family, but I have trouble accepting their socializin­g. She has removed pictures of me from her Facebook so as not to offend the ex and banned me from her son’s wedding. She has told me she doesn’t want me to attend any family events where the ex is present. Am I being unreasonab­le or immature in not accepting this situation?

— READY TO JUMP SHIP

DEAR READY: You are neither immature nor unreasonab­le. It would be interestin­g to know your girlfriend’s definition of “socializin­g.” That she has removed images of you from her Facebook and no longer wants you to attend family celebratio­ns tells me, as it should you, that more may be going on with her ex than she has told you (yet). I’m sorry, but I suggest you prepare yourself for some worse news, because it appears to me your romance is heading south.

DEAR ABBY: Please repeat a warning to your readers. Here in Tennessee, at least two young children have died recently as the result of being left inside a parent’s car on a hot day. Although many, if not most, states have passed laws against leaving children alone in a parked car (as well as people with disabiliti­es and pets), too often those laws are ignored, knowingly or unknowingl­y.

The temperatur­e inside a car with the windows up can rise as much as 20 degrees in 10 minutes. Within an hour, the interior of a car can easily become hot enough to cause heatstroke, which can prove fatal to children, an elderly or disabled person, or a pet. Even on cloudy days, inside temperatur­es can reach dangerous levels.

Because of this risk, the National Weather Service uses a slogan: “Look Before You Lock!” TV and radio stations across the country have joined this effort, and a number of websites and videos are available that focus on this important message. Abby, would you please print this commonsens­e reminder? TOM IN FAIRVIEW, TENN.

DEAR TOM: I’m pleased to join this campaign to save lives. Readers, if you are transporti­ng loved ones — including your pets — resolve to stay focused on their safety rather than the next task on your to-do list. These tragedies seem to happen when drivers are so distracted by what has to be done next that they forget about what’s going on in the present.

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