Helping children with their phobias
Experts advise taking one step at a time helps child overcome anxiety
Specific phobias, including insectophobia, are common in children and adolescents. Cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) with children is similar to CBT with adults, but there are some differences.
“With children, I start by editing the story that a mind is telling you — that bugs are, for example, our enemies who want to hurt us — to a new story that says that you might not be fond of bugs, but they’re just doing their bug thing, and you can live with them,” said Tamar E. Chansky, a clinical psychologist in Philadelphia and the author of “Freeing Yourself From Anxiety” and “Freeing Your Child From Anxiety.”
“We write down fears and predictions and then fact-check them based on what we learn about bugs. And we always give them silly names,” Chansky said.
Veronica L. Raggi, a clinical psychologist in Chevy Chase, Maryland, and author of “Exposure Therapy for Treating Anxiety in Children and Adolescents: A Comprehensive Guide,” said, “We make it as fun as possible, doing exposures aided by goal charts, and a salient reward system.”
When children see the exposure treatment as a game, they are more likely to participate, she said. Small successes and positive experiences build over time as children develop confidence and pride. Rewards for accomplishing exposure goals can further increase motivation.
When a child undergoes CBT, parents learn how to encourage the child to try something even if it’s a bit scary in the beginning, and how not to accommodate a child’s anxiety by always giving in to the fears. Raggi has found that the hardest thing for parents is to learn not to immediately come to the rescue. Parental modeling of curiosity, a sense of wonder and exploration and facing whatever feelings come up, lead to less fear and anxiety over time.
“Caregivers sometimes just need permission to nudge — but never force — their kids, to figure out where ‘yes’ is,” Chansky said.
She suggests setting up a courage challenge in May and June: “Let’s see who can get closer to cicadas and discover everything about them!”